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by dilf



Series: Seven Years and a Million Miles [1]
Category: Yu-Gi-Oh! GX
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Developing Relationship, Future Fic, M/M, Mild Sexual Content, so tender and mild
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-07-16
Updated: 2016-01-04
Packaged: 2018-04-09 15:53:26
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 11
Words: 31,730
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4355105
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dilf/pseuds/dilf
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>After years of not hearing from Judai, he falls (or rather collapses ungracefully) back into Manjoume's life. Things immediately get weird.</p>
<p>(companion piece to the ask-futuregx tumblr blog, details inside)</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. reunited and it feels so....

**Author's Note:**

> For the uninitiated, this takes place in a post-canon AU type thing I've made wherein Judai hasn't been heard from in seven years and then suddenly turns up a while after Ryo's death (yeah sorry about that). Due to his declining health, he ends up staying with Manjoume until he's in shape to resume his travels. For a bunch more info and art from this AU, visit: ask-futuregx.tumblr.com and dilfosaur.tumblr.com/tagged/gx-future-junk !!!
> 
> This story (series of tiny stories?) details how Judai and Manjoume got together in said AU thing. Enjoy.

If one week ago someone had told Manjoume that Judai Yuki would be standing in his living room, he absolutely would not have believed them; but if there was something Manjoume knew more than anything, it’s that life was, to say the least, utterly unpredictable. 

“Well. Make yourself at home.” Manjoume pointed toward the hallway near the staircase. “The guestroom is the second door on the left.” 

Judai stood still in the living room with a lost expression for a few more moments before nodding and shuffling toward the hall.

Manjoume watched him uncertainly. “Let me know if you need anything.”

“I’m fine,” Judai replied gruffly.

“I’m making tea.” 

“I’m fine-”

“I didn’t ask for your input. Go rest.”

Manjoume hurried to the kitchen, leaving the scruffy man to be. _Well, this is certainly an awkward arrangement._ Manjoume sighed as he filled one of his pots and set it on the stove. Why couldn’t Sho have taken Judai in? There was certainly room for him somewhere in that house, even with Rei. He was always better friends with Judai, too. Manjoume on the other hand… Manjoume had no idea what to do with the infamous vagrant who was now in his home and under his care and acting very, _very_ distant. 

A whistle cut through Manjoume’s thoughts as the water reached a boil. He mechanically picked out one of his favorite blends of tea and put it in to steep. 

It’s not like he expected Judai to be happy and even friendly after- how long had it even been, seven or eight years- of no contact, but this was uncomfortable to say the least. Should he try to talk to him? Manjoume was curious about what Judai had been up to all the years, he couldn’t lie about that, but Judai’s mood felt far too heavy for chit chat. It was getting late anyway- the sun was nearly set and Manjoume had places to be the next morning, so if he got Judai talking it wouldn’t disrupt his schedule anyway. Manjoume tapped his finger on the counter restlessly, willing himself to curb his curiosity for now at least. It’s not like Judai would be leaving right away; he could talk to him anytime, if Judai were willing to talk. Manjoume ran his hands through his hair in frustration. _Reuniting with an old friend you thought you’d never see again, but with all the comfort of letting a stranger into your home. That’s what this is._

He glanced at the clock. The tea should be ready.

Manjoume poured two generous mugs. Judai be damned, he was going to be a good host at least.

The door to the guestroom was left open, probably out of courtesy, but Manjoume still knocked on the frame before entering. Judai sat on the edge of the bed; he seemed to have been idly looking around, examining his surroundings, before he looked alertly to Manjoume, then to the tea. For a moment his brows furrowed and he seemed like he was going to protest, but he sighed softly and offered a half hearted smile. “Oh. Thank you, Manjoume.”

Had the air not been thick with discomfort, Manjoume would have told him to use “-san”. He cleared his throat and handed Judai the mug instead.

“The guest bathroom is right across the hall, in case you haven’t noticed. I’ll put out a towel for you to use.”

“Thanks.” Judai mumbled as he blew on his tea. He held the mug with both hands, almost childishly, which betrayed his rugged appearance. Manjoume adjusted his glasses as his eyes quickly skated over Judai.

Rugged. That’s not something Manjoume would’ve ever thought to describe Judai as before. Despite his wild personality, Judai had always seemed clean and youthful. The man sitting before him looked road-weary, yet resilient- the unkempt auburn hair that fell past his shoulders and the thick ginger stubble that covered his cheeks speaking to weeks, maybe months, of carefree travel. The Judai that Manjoume remembered was fresh-faced, slightly smaller than Manjoume though a little chubby; this Judai was surprisingly trim, his bulk now seeming to consist of more muscle than fat. I _guess that makes sense, if he does nothing but travel. He probably doesn’t stuff his face as much as he did in school, too._ His shoulders were broader now, which made him seem more intimidating when mixed with his height. Manjoume was very aware that he’d barely gotten any taller since his adolescence, but it was still a shock when Judai rose from his wheelchair at the hospital and Manjoume was eye level with his _mouth_.

Judai caught his eye as he took a sip of tea and Manjoume glanced away before taking a sip of his own, making a small disgruntled noise as he realized his tea hadn’t cooled down yet.

“I should leave you to rest.” Manjoume sighed as he regained himself, looking again at Judai. Judai was looking back at him intently, with almost a searching gaze. Manjoume raised his brow. “What is it?”

Judai shook his head. “Nothing. I’m sorry.”

“No, I know. You’re expecting me to ask you something.” Manjoume narrowed his eyes and scoffed. “Well, I’m not going to beat around the bush with you. You don’t have to talk to me about anything if you don’t want to. I don’t pry like Sho. My business is that you need to rest.”

The mood of the room shifted as Judai’s eyes widened, losing some of the edge in his expression. He hesitated. “T-thank you, Manjoume.”

Manjoume huffed and entirely out of instinct he corrected, “It’s ‘-san’.”

Judai softened and smirked, much to Manjoume’s surprise. Underneath the hair and the stubble and new few inches of height, was something very familiar after all.

 

**(DAY 1)**

The first couple days of Judai staying with Manjoume were full of surprises, to say the least. Starting with the next morning, when Manjoume got up bright and early for his practice duel to find Judai, fully dressed with his bag slung over his shoulder, in the living room lacing up his boots. The sheepish look he gave Manjoume when he saw him was almost endearing, had Manjoume not been struck by the sudden realization of what a chore taking care of Judai was going to be. 

“M-Manjoume!” The laces slipped out of Judai’s fingers.

“It’s ‘-san’.”

“You’re up early... “

“I have a career.” Manjoume walked over to him. “But on the other hand, what the hell are you doing?”

Judai sighed and his face hardened. “I can’t stay here. No offense.”

Manjoume wasn’t going to admit he was a little offended. “I don’t care if you stay here, Judai. Your health is at risk, and if it’s up to me- and it kind of is- you need to stay here as long as it takes for you to be back in good shape to travel.”

“No, I can’t impose on you like this.” Judai’s eyes darkened, as he lowered his head. “Not after all this time. And all I’ve done-”

“Oh boo hoo.” Manjoume snapped. “You’re still dwelling on that shit? Forget about all of that for christsakes.”

Judai’s head shot up, face tight with a remorseful expression. His lips were pressed together into a thin line, as if he were trying not to snap back. Manjoume groaned and pushed up his glasses as they slipped down the bridge of his nose.

“Sorry. To snap. Whatever.” He grumbled. “But I’ll be damned if I let another one of the greats die before his time.”

Judai’s lips parted with a soft breath and Manjoume took a step back. _Judai only recently found out about Ryo._ God, he really needed to quit sticking his foot in his mouth this morning. He rubbed his face and quietly added, “And the time doesn’t matter so much to me. We were friends. We were always friends, dummy.”

Manjoume turned away and quickly went back upstairs before Judai could respond. By the time Manjoume was leaving for practice, Judai had retreated back to the guest room. Manjoume decided not to check on him and instead texted Sho to let him know where the spare key to the house was, in case he wanted to make sure Judai was still around when he had the chance.

\---

When Manjoume came home about a quarter after five, he was admittedly surprised to find Judai sleeping peacefully in the guestroom. He was curled under the blankets with Pharoah huddled up to his side on top. Manjoume couldn’t help but smirk at the thought that this was probably the most comfortable Judai has been in years, aside from the hospital bed. He watched Judai for a moment before heading upstairs to relax himself.

Judai emerged from his room after seven, when Manjoume was in the kitchen eating. 

“Manjoume.” He greeted nervously.

“It’s… forget it.” Manjoume pointed to the array of take out boxes on the counter with his chopsticks. “Help yourself.”

“You sure…?”

“God forbid you starve, too.” Manjoume picked at his rice.

Judai almost smiled. “Thank you. Hey, I’m sorry about this morning... “

“I am too.” Manjoume waved his hand between bites. “There. It’s forgotten.”

This time, Judai did smile. “Thanks. I just- you can imagine this is bit weird for me.”

“Yeah, no kidding. It’s weird for me too.”

Judai gave a weak chuckle as he peeked through the various boxes of food. Manjoume glanced up just in time to see him open the box containing fried shrimp; Judai looked taken back for a second before his face split into a nostalgic smile. Manjoume looked down at his food and smiled to himself.

“Sho came by to visit today.” Judai said, as if trying to keep the conversation from dying. “He has a key to your house?”

“Mhm. Yeah. Sure.”

“You and him are good friends now, huh.”

“That’s what happens when you go pro at the same time in the same place, I guess.” Manjoume nodded. “You spend a lot of time together and then, bam, you’re good friends with the shrimpy dork from school.” 

“I wouldn’t call you a dork.” 

It took a moment to process it, but Manjoume perked at Judai’s quip. The scruffy man, hid his smile behind his hand. “But no, that’s cool. That you’re friends.”

Manjoume huffed. “Yeah, yeah.”

“I realized that this morning was the first time I remember you calling me your friend.”

“Oh, now you’re getting nostalgic about that kind of stuff? I’m sure I’ve said it at some point.”

Judai shook his head and shrugged as he took his place at the table with Manjoume.

“Well,” Manjoume sighed. “Things are clearer in hindsight.”

“I suppose so.” Judai took a generous bite of his food. “Manjoume?”

“Hm.”

“I’ll stay here until I’m better. I promise. You don’t have to stick Sho on Judai-watch duty.”

Manjoume blinked. “I- Well, whatever. He’ll probably do it anyway.” 

“But I mean it. Don’t worry. No running off.” Judai took another large bite. “I’ll try not to be weird about it, too.”

“I think that’s inevitable.”

“I’ll talk to you about whatever, if you want.”

“If I want? That never stopped you before.”

Judai chuckled again. He certainly seemed more relaxed now, Manjoume noted. He offered a small smile of his own before leaning forward.

“Well then, Yuki Judai. Where the hell have you been for seven years?”

\---

“Everywhere. The answer was essentially everywhere.”

“That’s still really vague,” purred the voice on the other end of the phone. “Judai used to be so transparent, and now he’s just one big mystery.” 

“I mean, he gave me details but god, after ten minutes my head was spinning.” Manjoume pushed his glasses down to rub his temples. “I still can’t believe this is happening, Asuka.”

“I know, and you’re right in the eye of the storm.” She hesitated for a moment. “Would it be weird if I came to visit? Summer break for the school is coming up, so I’ll have time.”

“I certainly don’t mind. I dunno about Judai. He’s kind of, well- he acts like he expects us to be upset with him about not talking to us, and stuff. I feel like I’m walking on eggshells when I try get info out of him.”

“He has such a hero complex.” Asuka gave a sigh. “I do want to see him before he up and disappears again. I may just come anyway. If he warms up to you, then I should have no trouble at all.” 

“What’s that supposed to mean?.” 

“I think I can be there Thursday- I’ll keep you posted. Butter him up for me.” She laughed. “I have to go!”

“Don’t be too hasty,” was all Manjoume could say before he heard the phone click. He rolled onto his stomach, sinking into his bed with a tired sigh. He opened his messages tab, figuring he should tell Sho that Asuka was thinking of visiting, and was surprised to see the ‘typing’ icon already at the bottom of the screen. _What are the odds..._

After a few moments, a new message box appeared:

**“i told kenzan bout judai and now he+jim are coming to domino.. cant stop them (;´Д`)”**

Manjoume blinked and quickly replied.

**“srs?? asuka said she wants to come too- thurs”**

**“they’ll prob come thurs too ∑(;°Д°) will judai be ok seeing them??”**

**“shrugs”**

**“ヽ（・＿・；)ノ”**

He put the phone down, holding it to his chest. Three days ago, his biggest worry was the exhibition match against Sho next week. Now with one fell swoop, his entire week- weeks to come, more likely- have been flipped on their head. Normally Manjoume would be upset; he hates having his plans disrupted, but for some reason he wasn’t this time- admittedly, he was excited. _That’s just like him, isn’t it?_

Manjoume sat up and rubbed his head tenderly; his headache had subsided but he couldn’t help but notice the rapid fluttering of his heart as he thought about his totally ruined week.

_Dammit Judai._


	2. what could possibly go wrong

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The end of the chapter references this post: ask-futuregx.tumblr.com/post/122139008718/not-exactly

**(DAY TWO)**

“Oh for fuck’s sake.”

Admittedly, the second morning Manjoume woke up after Judai’s return, it all still felt like a dream. He sat up in bed and thought about how unlikely the whole situation was, and he almost denied it ever happened as he made his way downstairs for his morning tea. So when the sight of Judai in the kitchen, wearing only a pair of boxers and opening all of his kitchen cabinets, snapped him back to reality, Manjoume didn’t know whether to laugh or scream. In the end he just grumbled his profanities barely loud enough to warn Judai of his arrival.

“Manjoume?” Judai stepped back from the cabinets and faced him. “You’re here this morning.”

“Yeah, I didn’t have anything this morning, but no- what is this?” Manjoume gestured groggily toward the walking cliche in front of him.

“I was just seeing what you had in here.”

“What I _had_? Christ.” Manjoume grumbled and pulled a mug out of one of the many opened cabinets and began filling the pot from the previous night with water. “Do you want anything?”

“N-no.” Judai scratched the back of his neck. “I mean, I’ll take whatever.”

Manjoume nodded and pulled out another mug, as well as two plates. “Leftovers it is.”

“Thanks... “

Manjoume leaned against the counter as Judai brought out the take out from the previous night. The lack of shirt uncovered new details for Manjoume to tuck away in his brain, such as Judai’s collection of strange tan lines and, more importantly, the surprising amount of freckles scattered across the broad expanse of his back. Manjoume blinked and cast his eyes down, embarrassed by himself. The teapot whistled and Manjoume got right back to work as Judai finally finished loading up his plate.

“Hey, Judai,” Manjoume tried to sound casual as he finished preparing the tea. “Can I ask you something?”

“Of course.” Judai raised his voice slightly over the hum of the microwave.

“I know this whole reunion thing was kind of a freak accident. But how would you feel about seeing others... ?”

Judai’s smile faltered. “Others? Who others?”

“Like,” Manjoume though about what the best way to go about this would be. “Well, like Asuka Tenjoin? And our other old friends from Duel Academy.”

To be fair, Judai didn’t immediately say no, but his face may have well turned completely white from how uneasy he looked.

“I’m… not against it,” He stammered. “They already know I’m here, don’t they?”

“Word travels fast,” Manjoume offered.

“I mean, I couldn’t say no now could I?” Judai gave a nervous laugh, cut short by the ringing of the microwave. He hastily turned to take out his plate.

“You could. It’s honestly up to you.”

Judai said nothing more but just gave a noncommittal shrug as he sat at the table while Manjoume prepared his own smaller plate and poured their tea. He placed a mug in front of Judai, who looked up at him with more relaxed, though slightly helpless, expression.

“I have to face them all sometime, won’t I?” He said quietly.

“Not the word I would use, but probably. If you being here right now should tell you anything, it’s that you’re fated to meet up with the people from your past eventually- ready or not.”

“Fated…” Judai nodded, looking more at ease. “I suppose so.”

“You’re awfully skittish aren’t you... “ Manjoume mumbled as he sat at the table and began to eat.

“You think?”

“Yep. Definitely.”

Judai gave another weak laugh. “Can’t help it.”

Manjoume raised his brow, but left it at that. Judai was so cryptic. “Oh. Judai?”

“Yes?”

“Can you at least put on some goddamn pants?”

 

**(DAY FIVE)**

The sudden return of Judai was certainly the top ranking thing on Manjoume’s list shocking events, but a close second was the efficiency with which a old gang gathered to see him. Asuka was timely and organized as expected; she had visited Manjoume and Sho once before and it was quite pleasant.

On the other hand, Kenzan and Jim- go figure those two ended up becoming inseparable- only ever showed up completely unannounced at Sho’s door on three or four entirely random occasions, or so Manjoume heard- he had only managed to see them once due to the fact that _some people has schedules to adhere to_.

Yet the second Judai turns up, everyone came swiftly to Domino City on a predetermined day and god, the phone communication was impeccable. It seems that Judai really brings out the best in people still. By Thursday night, everyone was tucked away in their respective homes and hotels with Judai none the wiser.

Even Johan Anderson joined into the mix. Manjoume had his number and knew he worked in uptown Domino but never spoke much with him; Johan was preoccupied and too energetic for Manjoume to put up on most days- it reminded him too much of Judai sometimes- so it slipped his mind to call him about Judai. He seemed to have found out from Sho or Rei in end, because Manjoume received a very loud and giddy phone call asking him what they planned to do.

It was Rei’s idea to have a “surprise party”. Manjoume, at least, knew this probably wasn’t the best suggestion but no one really knew what else there was to be done so they called it: they would all meet up at Manjoume’s the next evening while Manjoume took Judai out- Sho had the spare key after all- and when the two returned, everyone would be there waiting. A decent plan, though Manjoume would have described it more as a trap if anything.

So with that all decided, all that was left was for Manjoume to get Judai out of the house for a little while. He realized that the whole time Judai had been there, he hadn’t left house once- probably to honor the whole “I won’t run off” promise, but now Manjoume was at a loss of what he could coax Judai out of the house with. Food, probably? But they had food at the house….

Then he saw the bathtub drain.

“Do you need a haircut?” It came out as more of a demand than a question. He leaned against the doorway to the guestroom and crossed his arms. “Just wondering.”

Judai looked up from the large, tan cat in lap and pulled at a lock of brown hair that nearly reached his chest. “I guess I haven’t had one in a while. It is a bit of a hassle when it’s so long.”

“You don’t say.” Manjoume watched as Judai pushed his long bangs away from his face, seeming self conscious now. He had shaved off his short beard a couple days ago, leaving his jaw clean aside from the faint bristle of new stubble; his hair, however, was uncombed and clearly uncared for (confirmed by the pile of it in the tub). “Wanna get one?”

“You’re going to cut my hair?”

“Ew, no. I’ll take you to the salon I go to.”

“Oh… oh!” Judai looked surprised at the offer. The bed shifted under his weight as he shooed Pharoah away and got up.  “Yeah, sure. How much would that cost?”

“Seriously, don’t worry about it.”  Manjoume glanced at the clock on the nightstand. “Just hurry up.”

\---

A good haircut makes all the difference, they say. _Well, no shit._

Manjoume couldn’t help but be a little awestruck when Judai came over to the waiting area with most of the auburn mess chopped off. Where Judai looked sloppy and homeless before, he could probably fool people into thinking he wasn’t now; he looked more like a clean-cut world class duelist now- more like the Judai that Manjoume remembered. Yeah. Though he was still clearly older- his face no longer round and chubby, his jaw hard and his eyes accentuated with a few more lines and shadows- he really looked like Judai. Manjoume’s Judai.

“I haven’t had it this short in a long time.” Judai laughed sheepishly, rubbing the now naked back of his neck. “But now I don’t have to worry about it for a long time.”

“It looks good,” Manjoume blurted out a little too quickly. Judai laughed a little louder.

“Thanks! Are you sure you don’t want me to pay?”

“Save your money, Judai.” Manjoume huffed and pushed past him to go pay. “It’s seriously not a problem.”

Judai’s face softened to that grateful, guilty half-smile he wore so well and Manjoume sighed as he signed the receipt. He was starting to warm up to Judai the past few days; the initial awkwardness and angst of “oh I don’t want to be a burden after being a dick to you in school” passed quickly once Judai finally realized that Manjoume wasn’t resentful (obviously, that was seven years ago) and was actually very easy to get along with now (Manjoume wouldn’t deny that he was kind of a dick in school too)- but Judai always gave him that kicked puppy shtick every time Manjoume did something remotely nice for him. _Was I really that mean to him back then?_

Maybe Judai wouldn’t feel so bad once he knew what was waiting for him back home.

\---

The “surprise party” was definitely a disaster at first. Manjoume hadn’t given much thought to what a shock it would be for Judai to see a room full of people he had successfully avoided for almost a decade, but seeing Judai panic and run out the door almost instantly gave a clear idea of what that might be like.

With a tiny bit of coaxing he came back eventually, though, and seeing him smile with Asuka and laugh easily with Kenzan gave Manjoume a small sense of pride for some reason. If it weren’t for Manjoume, after all, Judai probably wouldn’t still be around to be seen. Maybe he was getting sentimental with age, but he couldn’t help but smile at the sight of everyone getting along.

His smile faltered when at the end of the night, amidsts goodbyes and promises to make lots of plans in the coming days, Johan caught Judai in an intimate and irritatingly long embrace; he buried his face in Judai’s neck and Judai wrapped his arms around him and wringed the fabric oh Johan’s coat with a tenderness and desperation that Manjoume had yet to see from him in the past few days, if not the entire time he’d know him.

He wasn’t sure why that bothered him.


	3. so you had a bad day

**(DAY 9)**

Despite the surprise reunions and the new house guest- plus cat- Manjoume actually found his life generally unchanged. He was a very busy man; now he was just a little busier.

Judai stayed to true to his promise not to run off, and if anything he made himself very at home at Manjoume’s; after a week had passed, Judai’s belongings (what little it may have been) had been unpacked entirely and scattered about the guest room. Small knick knacks and artifacts were placed carefully on the dresser while clothes we strewn carelessly on the floor beside the bed. Manjoume would have offered to to take Judai clothes shopping based on what he saw, but he had no time for it right now.

The exhibition match with Sho was growing closer which meant preparation and, much to Manjoume’s chagrin, press appearances. Between that meeting up with his manager and the others from Duel Academy, Manjoume felt he rarely saw Judai for several days other than at breakfast when they took turns preparing tea and chit chatting. He cherished breakfast though; Judai told him stories from his travels and as they warmed their food, bumping shoulders because Manjoume wasn’t so put off by his no longer dirty appearance. Amidst the hecticness of the past few days, it was breath of fresh air- and it was enough for Manjoume, he told himself.

However, breakfast always ended too soon, as Manjoume always had to rush off to some event- today it was a joint press conference with himself and Sho, or rather Manjoume Thunder and Kaiser. The two really played up their persona’s rivalries for their audience, so while the events could admittedly be somewhat fun, they were still very tiring.

Manjoume sighed as he finished applying his foundation. What he would give to just stay in bed all day and do whatever he wanted all day like Judai.

Preparing for appearances was a chore Manjoume actually found somewhat enjoyable; he got ready with Sho but usually took longer since Sho didn’t fuss much with make up like Manjoume did, so this usually left them with time to chat.

“So how’s stuff with Judai?” Sho asked idly as he tried to brush his hair into a less wild state. “I haven’t had time to stop by your place with all this match stuff.”

“Yeah, me neither.” Manjoume groaned as he steadied himself to draw his signature lightning bolt. “I pretty much just see him in the morning most days. I’ve only had the chance to stop by the house a couple afternoons, and he’s always asleep at night I guess.”

“That’s good that he’s taking resting seriously, isn’t it! I wonder what he does all day, though.”

Manjoume did wonder that too. Judai wasn’t the type who could idle around all day, but Manjoume was determined not to be nosey and just let him be- though admittedly he did snoop a little fill his curiosity. “Who knows really, but there is one thing I noticed.”

“What’s that?”

Manjoume huffed, trying to keep his face still as he filled in the lightning bolt. “He’s been inviting Johan over. I saw his shoes by the door a couple times, and I heard them talking in the guestroom.”

In the mirror, Sho’s reflection raised it’s brow. “Oh. that’s interesting.”

“Interesting? More like... annoying.”

“No- I mean… wait, did you even know?”

Manjoume’s stroke slowed. “Know what?”

“They dated. Senior year.”

Manjoume put his brush down slowly and turned to Sho with a stupefied expression. He most certainly had not known that. He was pretty preoccupied his last year before graduation to notice, he guessed. He couldn’t say he was actually surprised- those two deserved each other. But something about it made the fact they were still so close- so intimate- made the revelation even more shocking to Manjoume.

“Maybe they’re getting back together.” Sho smirked.

Manjoume’s stomach twisted at the idea. “Tch. Not in my house.”

“Save the temper for the cameras, Thunder.” Sho cocked his head to the side. “Do they bother you?”

“Well, yeah. Because it’s my house!” Manjoume snapped. “And Judai’s my responsibility!”

Sho put up his hands in a dismissive gesture. “Woah, Manjoume. I get it, but you make it sounds like Judai’s your pet. He has his own life, remember?”

Manjoume looked down with a frustrated sigh. _Of course, like I could forget._

\---

Admittedly, Manjoume was pleased to see Judai waiting for him with Rei in the dressing room after the press conference.

“Hey! You two were so cool out there!” Rei squealed. “You’re such good actors!”

Beside her, Judai beamed as bright as a thousand suns, and Manjoume opted not to look directly at him. “Yeah! Sho! I had no idea you were such a bad ass!”

Judai threw his arm over Sho’s shoulder and Manjoume turned away entirely, heading to the mirror to start removing his make-up. _Stupid Judai. After all I do for him, he could at least greet me._

He closed his eyes and wiped away the lightning bolt, dismissing that childish thought; when he opened them, he was surprised to see two hazel eyes meet his in the mirror. He jumped as Judai laughed behind him and put a hand on his shoulder, giving a playful squeeze.

“You’re removing it already? It suits you!” He said teasingly.

Manjoume shrugged, suddenly feeling flustered. “It’s better for my skin. You’ll see it again at the duel“

Judai softened, not removing his hand from Manjoume’s shoulder. “Am I allowed to come to that?”

“Of course.” Manjoume’s voice fell to a surprisingly sweet tone without him noticing. This only made Judai’s smile brighter.

“What a relief! I wouldn’t want to miss two of my best friends having such a high profile duel!”

Manjoume nodded and continued tackling his make-up. Judai pulled his hand away- finally- and slid into the seat beside him. “Hey.”

“Hey.”

“I’m hungry. Let’s get food after this? That would be nice since I feel like I’ve barely seen you.”

Manjoume’s mouth almost quirked into a smile. “Yeah, sure.”

“Ah, thank goodness!”

Manjoume discarded the dirty wipe and began to remove his contacts, trying to hurry for the sake of Judai’s stomach. “Anything you really want?”

“I’m happy as long as it’s edible.” His voice was lighter, with an amused air to it. “You really are wearing contacts, huh?”

“So?”

“I’m just a little surprised. I didn’t realize the glasses were prescription.”

“Don’t mock me.”

“I’m not!”

Manjoume scowled as he slipped on his glasses, but his frown immediately faded when he saw Judai shooting him a fond smile in the mirror.

“They suit you." Judai’s face split into a massive grin. "They’re perfect for you!” 

\---

There was something satisfying about sharing a cozy corner booth with Judai. Manjoume didn’t consider himself an introvert, but in the past week between his manager and the press and Sho and Rei and Asuka and Kenzan and Jim and even Johan- Manjoume was exhausted. It was true that despite living together him and Judai barely crossed paths in the past few days, so just being able to talk to Judai alone somewhere outside of this kitchen made him happier than he cared to admit.

“Hey Judai?”

Judai peeked over his menu attentively; they ended up a cheap sit down restaurant that specialized in comfort food- not Manjoume’s typical choice but Judai seemed keen to these types of places.  “Yep?”

“What did you do today?”

“I actually went out with Jim and Kenzan.” He smiled warmly. “Nothing too strenuous, don’t worry.”

Manjoume nodded, feeling himself relax a little with that answer. “I’m still really busy tomorrow. What are your plans?”

“I’m gonna hang out with Johan.”

Manjoume flashed him a tight smile before Judai dove back into his menu. Determined to not let the meal dissolve into awkward silence- _because what was there to be upset about, seriously_ \- Manjoume expertly avoided the subject of Johan for the rest of the night.

 

**(DAY 11)**

The exhibition match was a huge success, thankfully.

Manjoume won, of course- he had to keep up his undefeated streak. Sho put up a good fight, though, and the audience was thrilled. Manjoume wiped the back of wrist against his forehead, no longer mindful to the make-up. _Thank god all that work paid off._

The whole gang was waiting in the dressing room for them and before he knew it, Manjoume was scooped up into Judai’s arms in a crushing hug. Maybe he was just so tired, but he swore his feet left the ground for a good few moments as the rest of him slid up against Judai’s body.

“Manjoume! Holy crap!”

“Let go of me!” He yelped, flailing helplessly. “You’re too strong!”

“You’re one to talk!” Judai practically wheezed. “You’re amazing! I really have to duel you now!”

He finally released Manjoume, who practically melted back onto the ground; before he realized it, he grabbed onto Judai’s arms to steady himself again- it wasn’t until his thumbs brushed down Judai’s bicep that he finally whipped his hands away and shot Judai a vicious scowl. A few people in the room laughed.

“But seriously.” Judai beamed. “I’ve got goosebumps. We need to duel like yesterday.”

“I’m not supposed have unofficial duels,” Manjoume glanced aside and added quietly. “But I’ll see.”

Judai let out a loud laugh and turned to hassle Sho while Manjoume rejoined the group. Rei pulled him into a much safer congratulatory hug of her own and looked up at him with glimmering eyes.

“So are we invited to the after party too?” She bounced giddily.

Manjoume grimaced; he almost forgot about the after party that he definitely had to attend. “Yeah, yeah. Of course.”

Rei pumped her fist in the air while Judai looked back over at Manjoume, catching his eye. “Coming, Judai?”

Judai bit his lip and looked down sheepishly. Manjoume could already guess the answer, much to his (secret) disappointment.

“I’m not crazy about big parties.” Judai scratched his head. “I think I’ll skip this time. I’m sorry. I’ll see you tomorrow though!”

“Understandable,” Manjoume said quietly. He couldn’t linger, he needed to get ready. “I’ll see you later then.”

Judai gave him an apologetic smile as Manjoume passed him to get changed, but when Manjoume found himself glancing back over his shoulder, he felt his heart sink as Johan followed Judai out the door.

\---

Parties for the pro leagues weren’t exactly a common occurrence, and they weren’t exactly the least stressful things, so usually Manjoume came home from them a little more buzzed than he should be. There was nothing wrong with a little indulgence after a difficult week, he figured, and it wasn’t like he was ever the type who lost control over himself after a little alcohol. He definitely hadn’t gotten as smashed as Rei- _good luck with that one, Sho_ \- and he did have a better time than usual with his friends there; he couldn’t help but wonder what would have happened if Judai had decided to some, though.

When he eventually stepped into his house- after minimal struggle with his keys, of course- Manjoume immediately felt the room shift as he noticed an extra pair of shoes by the door- Johan’s shoes. He flinched, stepping back and bumping into the door. _What the fuck was Johan still doing here so late?_

With a huff, he made his way to the guestroom and knocked hastily on the closed door. He shut eyes until he heard the squeak of hinges and found himself glaring at Judai’s chin until he shifted his gaze up to meet brown eyes. He hated the he had to look up at Judai- _he hated it._

“Hi, Manjoume. Are you okay?” Judai sounded concerned.

“Yeah, yeah. Just tired. Is Johan here?”

“Yeah, sorry. He was going to leave in a sec-”

“Please. I’m going to bed and I just,” He bit his lip, not sure what he wanted to say. “It’s just late, okay?”

“Of course!” Judai bowed his head sheepishly. “I’ll take care of the locks, don’t worry!”

Manjoume just gave him a grunt, wavering slightly. Judai leaned over him; he _hated_ it.

“Do you need help? You seem kind of, well,” Judai’s eyes narrowed. “Drunk.”

“I’m nooooot drunk.” Manjoume spat.

“Yeah, sure.” Much to Manjoume’s annoyance, Judai reached out and held Manjoume’s shoulders, practically covering them completely with his large hands. He gave him a warm, cheeky smile. “I can carry you upstairs if you want. Probably safer.”

“Like hell it is.” Manjoume pulled away weakly. Judai titled his head as Manjoume shrugged away his hands. “Tired.”

“Okay, okay. Sorry. Careful with those stairs.”

“I’m fine. Good night.” Manjoume waved his hand dismissively and walked briskly away, impressively steadily for how wobbly his legs were feeling; the stairs were a little more difficult to maneuver. He paused about halfway up and rubbed his neck. He wasn’t drunk; he hadn’t even had that much to drink this time- right? _What’s wrong with me?_

In a blur Manjoume found himself collapsing face first onto the bed, flailing his legs to kick off his shoes before going completely limp. He shut his eyes, hearing footsteps downstairs, voices too faint to make out. Manjoume gnawed at his lip. He wanted to hear what they were saying- he wanted to know why t _he fuck Johan was in his house at one in the fucking morning._

He honestly had trouble placing why exactly he was so upset with Johan- Sho’s words echoed his head: _he has his own life, remember?_ If Judai wanted to spend all his time with Johan then that was entirely up to Judai. _But it wasn’t fair._ Judai was staying with him- practiacally being taken care of by him- and yet it felt like he barely got any of Judai’s attention. He yearned for Judai to look at him, to talk to him, to tell him things- only him, before anyone else.

His breath caught at the thought of Judai; the thought of his concerned voice and how annoyingly tall he was and the glint in his eyes and his fucking chin and his shoulders and his hands, his big fucking hands, and how he right downstairs anytime Manjoume wanted him.

Manjoume rolled onto his back and shrugged off his jacket as he squirmed around on the bed. He put his hands on this shoulders- he could still feel where Judai had touched him; his touch was warm and left a cozy imprint on Manjoume. Compared to Judai, Manjoume’s fingers were cold and slight. He sighed. The voices downstairs fell silent, presumably because Johan was gone and Judai had gone back to his room. He couldn’t help but feel a tinge of relief at that- just him and Judai in the house. Just-

 _Oh._ Manjoume gasped, quickly covering his mouth as he felt his face heat up. _Oh God._ What was he doing? He wasn’t some kid with a crush- he was an adult. He shouldn’t be so turned on by Judai fucking touching his shoulder. Manjoume groaned. _But I am. I’m so depraved_. He quickly glanced at the door to make sure it was closed- he didn’t remember if had shut it- before sinking further into the bed. Judai.

He traced the quickly fading heat of his shoulder, wrapping his fingers into the fabric of his shirt. He hadn’t given much thought to Judai’s hands compared to his own; the difference wasn’t extreme, certainly, but it never occurred to Manjoume that Judai could easily grab him, lift him, carry him- probably with little effort too. _When did Judai grow up so much?_

The way Judai practically towered over Manjoume- well, maybe not towered but he stood over him enough that Manjoume could easily be covered by him, his slim body enveloped in Judai’s larger frame- drove Manjoume crazy. God, he couldn’t be more annoyed about how even Judai had grown taller than him but he’d be in denial not to admit he found it a little exciting.

An airy sigh escaped Manjoume’s lips as he fumbled to loosen his belt and undid his pants. The heat from his face had spread to the rest of his body and Manjoume relaxed into the covers and stared blankly at the ceiling.

They dated during school- Johan and Judai. That’s what he heard from Sho. Had they ever been together though? Really together? Manjoume groaned at the thought, feeling strangely dirty. Judai was still a kid back then- even during his broody senior year, Manjoume had always remembered Judai as a kid. But Judai now- Judai was a man now. _I prefer him now._

The bed creaked softly as Manjoume shifted his hips.

What a fucking tease Judai was to him, too. He was practically always shirtless in the morning, a habit he claimed but made little effort to break. Manjoume prided himself in how well he hid his stares, drinking up the sight of his tanned, freckled skin and his soft muscles. He never looked below Judai’s stomach though, he wouldn’t allow himself to be so perverted; but he’d be lying if he said he hadn’t given thought to what more there was to know about Judai’s body.

Manjoume swallowed back the urge to say Judai’s name aloud. _What if he heard?_

Instead he groaned, thinking about how Judai was just downstairs, just yards away from him in his own room, own bed. Manjoume felt a pang of guilt- of shame even- that he was thinking about his friend like that, but he couldn’t fight the excitement that bubbled in him at the thought that Judai was so close. _Judai was practically his._

The house was completely silent as Manjoume continued as quietly as possible. He was pretty sure Judai wouldn’t hear anything even if he did allow himself to be a little noisy; the rooms were far enough apart, the walls thick enough. He swallowed with the realization.

“J-”

He held it back still. He was pretty sure Judai couldn’t hear him, since he could never hear anything Judai did. Manjoume’s eyes widened at that thought. Judai could be thinking about him and he would never know it. Manjoume bit his lip, thinking again of Judai’s hands, his skin, his body tangled in the bedsheets and that handsome face twisted as he tried his best to keep silent too. _He could be doing it right now._

With a louder than intended moan, that thought just about finished him.


	4. falling for the, well, second time

**(DAY 12)**

Waking up with a dry mouth and the soft throb of an impending headache was something Manjoume could deal with just fine. But waking up covered in dried cum with the realization that he was horribly and utterly attracted to his friend who was currently living in his house?

That was far more complicated.

He immediately knew he made a huge mistake- it had been a stressful few days and Manjoume had been very high-strung and _oh god why did he do that?_ It was going to be difficult to look at Judai that morning, to say the least. The worst part was knowing he would see Judai and remember that Judai was a very real person and not some depraved fantasy, and having to pretend that everything was fine and totally normal and nope, Manjoume totally did not completely dehumanize Judai in a jealous, horny, slightly intoxicated fit of frustration.

_Nope, never happened_. He watched himself drag his hands down the sides of his face in the bathroom mirror remorsefully; he had changed into fresh clothes and made sure he was all cleaned up from his night of regret. He checked himself one last time before he took a deep breath and readied himself to head downstairs.

Manjoume walked into the kitchen, half hoping Judai wouldn’t be there; so when he saw him already making their tea, he flinched. _Oh good god- I can do this._

Judai peeked over his shoulder as if on cue and offered a bright smile. “Morning, Manjoume! Need anything?”

“No.” Could he have answered that any quicker? Manjoume cleared his throat. “Good morning.”

“You sure?” Judai, swayed as he turned back to the stove. “I mean, the tea’s almost ready, but do you need any food? Aspirin maybe? I’ll take care of it.”

“You’re hilarious. Ha ha.” Manjoume rolled his eyes and pushed past Judai to get a plate. “I can hardly stand it.”

“So no hangover after all? Impressive.”

“I wasn’t drunk, knucklehead. I told you.”

“Could’ve fooled me.” Judai shrugged as he poured their tea into Manjoume’s navy mug from the world championships a couple years ago, and the bright yellow but otherwise plain mug that Judai had adopted as his. Manjoume watched, noting that Judai knew which mug he liked and, by the scent of the steam rising, which blends were Manjoume’s favorite. He tried not blush, but he did feel a bit lighter as he realized it was much easier than he thought it would be to pretend he wasn’t hiding his awful, embarrassing secret.

“Thank you.”

Judai gave him that signature dopey grin. “Least I can do, champ! Sorry again about last night.”

Manjoume felt his chest tighten for moment. He thanked the gods that he had only a foggy recollection of what he had, well, imagined last night, or eye contact with Judai would’ve been completely impossible.

“It’s fine,” he practically wheezed out, much to his embarrassment. He shook his head as he reached over to grab a roll from the bread box. Something still bothered him though. “But why was Johan here so late? What are you two up to?”

Okay, the last part came out a little too forceful. Judai looked up, his sunny smile replaced with an wide-eyed look that just screamed ‘you caught me’. Manjoume's stomach dropped slightly.

“Nothing!” Judai sputtered out, cheeks turning pink. “I mean, we just talk. About- y’know- stuff!”

“Stuff, huh.” Manjoume frowned. “That late at night?”

“Oh yeah. I found that some of the most insightful and revealing conversations happen very late at night.”

“Revealing... ?”

“Yeah. I mean,” Judai laughed his stupid laugh. “People are more honest when they’re really tired. Weakened inhibitions. It’s like being drunk, y’know? It’s revealing.”

Manjoume stared intently at the bread on his plate to hide his face that was probably beet red. I _’m being punished. God is mocking me._ “Y-yeah. I’m so sure.”

“You don’t think so? You and I should have a late night talk sometime.”

Manjoume perked, glancing at Judai. “Um. We’ll see.”

That got him a smirk from Judai, who seemed at ease again. “Yeah, and you owe me a duel too! A secret duel.”

“I never agreed to that.” A smile creeped onto Manjoume's face as he blew on his tea.

“You’ll be less busy now with the exhibition match over, right? We should have, like, an outing or something. I haven’t actually done anything with you specifically.“

Manjoume swallowed; his throat was still very dry. “Don’t you get enough of me just living here?”

“That’s not the same... “

“Yeah?” Manjoume peered up from his mug to see Judai staring at him. Manjoume dropped his smile, earning him another smirk and an admittedly heartwarming laugh.

“Yeah.” Judai turned away.

Manjoume watched him prepare his own plate for breakfast, so wrapped up in food and tea and chattering about yesterday’s duel that he was completely oblivious to Manjoume’s helpless, longing expression- the face of a man who could tell this whole Judai-ordeal was becoming far more than he ever anticipated.

\---

Manjoume lasted about six emotional hours knowing what he did before be completely lost it, right in the middle of a coffee date with Asuka.

“Can I ask you something weird?” He blurted out, immediately regretting it.

“I guess so,” Asuka replied, unfazed.

“Actually, never mind! Forget it.”

“Too late.”

She looked at him with a cool, inquiring gaze and Manjoume practically whined. What was he thinking? How does he even say... ?

“Um. God... “ Manjoume felt his face heat up so fast he thought he was going to explode. “I guess- I guess I’m considering being interested in someone.”

Asuka scoffed at the strange wording and took a sip of her coffee. “Who? Judai?”

Manjoume nearly spilt his own drink onto his lap. “What the fuck, Asuka?!”

“I doubt you’d be so freaked out and embarrassed over anyone else. Except maybe Sho. It’s not Sho, is it?

“No! It’s Judai!” Manjoume yelped, far louder than he wished he had. He sunk into his chair with a resigned sigh. “I’m so fucked.”

“Jeez. What happened?”

“N-nothing. Literally nothing. I just... He’s, um, he’s really good looking, obviously. And he’s in my house all the time. It’s driving me crazy.”

“You sound like a lovesick puppy. That’s so you.”

Manjoume pouted and Asuka’s icy demeanor broke into a fit of laughter.

“You realize the irony of the situation, right?” She said between laughs.

“Shut up! I’m not lovesick! It’s not like that! I’m just… I don’t know, okay?”

“Then why are you telling me this? What’s eating at you?”

Another reluctant whine escaped Manjoume; it was too late to turn back, he was too far down this road already. “I feel guilty.”

“For liking him?”

“...Yeah.”

“Why?”

“I just... “

Asuka’s stare was relentless. Manjoume sighed.

“I’ve thought about him.” He lowered his voice to the quietest whisper still audible to humans. “Like- you know…”

“While you masturbated?”

“Oh my god, you’re so unladylike!”

“And you’re a prude. So you fantasized about him, and?”

“And? And he’s a real fucking person!” Manjoume’s hiss grew louder with each word. “And then I go downstairs in the morning and there he fucking is! Do you see how wrong this is? Do you see my dilema?”

“Honestly, no.”

Manjoume shook his head, covering his face with both hands. “I regret this entire conversation.”

“I mean we all get off to something.” She shrugged. “So you find him attractive. Do something about it. Maybe talk to him instead of me- scope things out.”

“I can’t just scope things out.”

“Why not?”

“Because that would make things weird! And he’s living with me!”

“Not for much longer, right? So who cares.”

Manjoume felt his heart sink a little at that thought. Judai was inevitably going to run off sooner or later, wasn’t he? “Either way, I don’t know what he thinks of me. I have nothing to go on.”

“If you wait around for him to make the first move, then you’ll probably miss out.  Just say something.”

He shook his head. “I hate this. I hate you.”

Despite the amused smirk she wore, Asuka’s voice dropped to an even and serious tone. “I know you said you weren’t lovesick, but if this is the game you’re playing then I think you might be lying to yourself. You’re not just interested in his looks and you don’t think of him like a piece of meat; I know you- you’re a romantic sap and it’s only a matter of time before you’re head over heels for him at this rate.”

Manjoume felt his face heat up all the way to the tips of his ears. “I’m gonna drop all of this right now, just to spite you.”

“You can’t. I know you can’t.” Asuka’s smile widened. “Seriously, Manjoume. Are you just attracted to his body or do you want something more from him?”

“I…” Manjoume couldn’t bring himself to say that he wanted a lot more- thinking about it actually made him feel kind of sad. “I don’t know what I want, really. Or why I feel I want the things I do.”

“Because you’re you. You’re really self absorbed and sensitive.”

“Aw, thanks Asuka.” Manjoume glowered at her.

“Come on, I’m trying to help!”

“I know. Thanks. Really.” Manjoume sighed, nursing his drink. “Two weeks ago I wasn’t even sure that Judai was alive, and now I... “

He groaned into his coffee. Asuka reached across the table and patted his head. “Things happen for a reason, don’t they?”

“Maybe it was fated.”

“Yeah. I’ll be rooting for you, Manjoume.”

“Nothing’s even happened yet.”

Asuka finished her coffee with a satisfied sigh. “I always thought you two would make a good couple.”

Manjoume stared at his coffee cup, wondering if it were possible to drown himself in it.

\---

By the end of the day, Manjoume no longer felt as bad about the whole “last night incident”; that wasn’t to say he still didn’t feel awful and ashamed about it, but not as much as before. Talking to Asuka, as embarrassing as it was, helped tremendously. He couldn’t feel too guilty- it’s not like Judai was the first person he ever fantasized about- and if there was anything he had learned in the quagmire that was his love life, it was that these feelings couldn’t stop him from having a good relationship with Judai.

The evening was quiet, as Judai appeared to be resting for much of it. Manjoume decided it was best to leave him be, because if Judai wanted to see him then he would come on his own accord.

As it turns out, Judai remained true to is plan to have a “revealing” conversation with Manjoume; that night, Judai knocked on his bedroom door sometime around midnight with fresh tea- another blend Manjoume loved to drink before bed- and a packet of snacks that seemed to come from a gas station. Manjoume looked up from his book, cozy on his bed.

“Am I bothering you?” Judai smiled sheepishly.

“I suppose not.” Manjoume lied, trying not sound too happy to see him. “You wanna talk or something?”

“I told you we would, right?” Judai grinned and sat on the edge of the bed, before flopping backwards and getting immediately comfortable. “And I was bored with sleeping.”

“How can you get bored with sleeping?”

“I just do.”

“Get a job, Judai, Then you’ll really start to enjoy sleeping.”

Judai laughed, and Manjoume couldn’t help but smile. Judai opened the snacks and popped one into his mouth before offering one to Manjoume; even though he could tell just by looking at them that they were too sweet for his liking, he took one anyway.

“So,” Judai mumbled as he chewed. “I was wondering something.”

“Hm.”

“What happened between you and Asuka?”

Manjoume coughed a little, though to be fair it was partially due to the overwhelming sugar content of the snack. “What do you mean what happened?”

Judai rolled onto his side to face him. “I mean, you used to be totally in love with her, and now you two are like really good friends. Which is awesome, I mean- I was just curious ‘cause she used to complain about you a lot. No offense.”

“Hmph. No, I know.” Manjoume finally put his book aside. “I mean, we spent a lot of time apart and I just stopped having those feelings for her.”

“Oh, c’mon. There’s gotta be more to it than that.”

Manjoume rolled his eyes. “Okay, fine. Not long after graduation, she left for America and I went to the airport to see her off. She told me that she was going to ignore me if I tried to contact her with romantic intent, since she wouldn’t have to deal with me in person. But otherwise she wanted to remain friends and told me to contact her when I was ready for that. So that’s how it went down.”

“How long did it take? For you to contact her?”

“I dunno.” Manjoume pouted. “Like a couple years.”

That got him a laugh and an annoyingly sweet “awww” from Judai. “But it’s so cool that you two are so close still!”

“Yeah,” Manjoume leaned back, relaxing more on the bed. He really appreciated Asuka and all the times she helped him- like today. He glanced at Judai. “Like you at Johan?”

Judai blinked and rolled onto his stomach, resting his chin on his hand. “Ah, you knew too, huh?”

“I heard. So, your turn- what happened between you and him?”

“I mean we dated for a while during school, during the thick of things, really.” Judai’s expression became pensive and he ran his thumb across the underside of his chin. He dropped his hand and rolled back onto his side. “We broke up before graduation.”

“Yeah?”

“Well, not for any bad reason. Like we didn’t fight. It just kind of happened. One of those ‘for the best’ kind of things.”

“I see.”

“And yeah. Since there was no hard feelings between us then, and I left to travel shortly after, I was able to remain really close to him. Sorry, it’s not a funny story like yours.”

“Gee, thanks.” Manjoume slid further into bed and rolled onto his side as well, so that he and Judai were facing each other. “Are you two dating again now?”

Judai’s eyes widened. “What? What gave you that idea?”

Manjoume felt his cheeks heat up as he scowled defensively. “Because you two spend so much time cozying up together.”

“I told you we just talk! He gives really good advice, okay?” Judai chuckled. “Why, are you jealous?”

“What? No!” Manjoume balled his fists on the comforter. “I just thought you two were messing around in my house!”

“No, no, no. Don’t you worry about that! We just- I told you. He’s kind of the easiest person to talk to about some stuff.”

“What stuff?” Manjoume said a little too eagerly.

Judai blinked, giving Manjoume a rather serious look over for a moment; he broke it with a shrug. “Stuff. I suppose… Interpersonal stuff.”

Manjoume furrowed his brow. Why was Judai always so vague? What did that mean? “Interpersonal? But you and he... ?”

“We broke up once already. As much as I,” Judai hesitated as if he were trying to mind his words. “As much as I love him, I think our decision was a good one. And like, you could say he was my high school sweetheart! We’re adults now, and it’s a big world- y’know?”

“So no one from school, then?” Manjoume watched Judai intently, and their eyes met across the few inches between their faces. Judai’s expression was solemn and his lips parted thoughtfully.

“I mean,” He swallowed. “I wouldn’t say that.”

There was a long pause, eventually broken only by a small yawn that Manjoume- _stupid, stupid, STUPID_ \- couldn’t hold back any longer. He squirmed to cover his mouth with the back of his hand and gave Judai a sheepish look. Judai only smiled, all of his joy and tenderness returning to his face.

“I’m sorry, I’m keeping you up.” He laughed. “You’re tired.”

“Sorry,” Manjoume stammered. He really was exhausted as usual, but he was so close to scoping out Judai, _goddammit_. “S-some of us don’t sleep all evening.”

“Tomorrow!” Judai exclaimed. “We’ll talk more. You’re fun to talk with too.”

“Um. Thanks.” Manjoume shifted in bed, about to stretch.

It was only then that he realized the warm weight of Judai’s hand resting on his thigh. He froze. He was so wrapped up in their conversation the he hadn’t even noticed Judai touching him at all. Judai sat up and pulled away, his fingers dragging ghostlike, so delicately down the side of Manjoume’s leg until their warmth was gone. Manjoume watched the hand, then looked up at Judai’s glistening, smiling eyes with a dumbfounded expression.

“Goodnight, Manjoume.”

 


	5. it was the heat of the moment

Manjoume was awake well after two in the morning, lying completely still and staring, unblinking, at nothing in particular- just alone with his thoughts. His Judai-related thoughts. He’d be proud to admit they weren’t the same thoughts he had the previous night, but they were still completely dominated by Judai nonetheless- specifically the image of his hand skating teasingly down Manjoume’s thigh replaying over and over again.

Did… Judai make a pass at him?

You wouldn’t do something like that to someone you weren’t interested in, right? _Definitely not._ He sighed and his thoughts broke just long enough to remember his talk with Asuka: _you sound like a lovesick puppy._ Manjoume blinked at the vague, blurry darkness of his room, his heart fluttering and his face burning. He was glad he was alone, for the moment.

It was difficult to sleep that night.

 

**(DAY THIRTEEN)**

Despite the heaviness of his eyes, Manjoume felt light as a feather when he walked into the kitchen and saw Judai- in his usual shirtless glory- starting to make their usual morning tea, in his usual carefree way. Manjoume paused, watching the scene with a growing sense of unease.

It was all so _usual_.

"Morning." He mumbled, sounding uncharacteristically bashful.

"Morning!" Judai replied cheerily. Manjoume bit his lip as their elbows brushed and he glanced up at Judai. He probably stayed up much later than Manjoume but he still look energetic and radiant as ever, his eyes bright and the start of a five o'clock shadow dusting his jaw. He hummed tunelessly as he put the teapot on the stove and turned to Manjoume, who couldn’t stop himself from running his eyes down Judai’s stomach before looking directly into Judai’s eyes; they almost seemed like they were two different colors in the morning’s light.

They stood facing eachother in silence for a few moments. Manjoume frowned.

_Nothing._

Was Judai trying to act like nothing happened? Did he not mean anything about the touch? _No fucking way. You don’t just do that to anyone._

The admittedly disappointing turn of events only helped him realize how exhausted he was. He scowled and looked aside, though he could still feel Judai’s eyes on him. _Maybe I shouldn’t say something._

“You okay?” Judai sounded concerned- the asshole. He leaned in, and Manjoume leaned away.

_No._

Manjoume looked up at him again with narrowed eyes. “Judai.”

“Mm. Manjoume?”

“I told you right away when you showed up here that I would be straightforward with you, didn’t I?”

“I suppose so.” Judai gave him a quizzical look.

Manjoume scoffed. Okay, he hadn’t exactly been too honest with Judai this entire time, but he was at least better than the convoluted and often unnecessarily angsty enigma that was Judai. “You’re probably waiting for me to say something first, aren’t you?”

“About what?”

“Well,” he took a slow breath. “What was that stunt you pulled last night?”

“Stunt?”

“You touched me.”

Judai glanced aside, his cheeks turning just a little pink. “Touched you?”

Manjoume groaned, finally running out of patience. “God, just tell me what your intentions are! You were looking right at me, so don’t act like you didn’t do it on purpose!”

An unusual modesty crossed Judai’s face as he finally looked back at Manjoume, his red face betraying his attempt at looking serious. “I mean-”

“Judai.” Manjoume took a deep breath. “I… I want to know.”

“Can I make it more obvious?”

The two of them stood there, staring each other down in silence with equally flushed faces. Manjoume swallowed to keep himself from grinding his teeth down to the gums.

“No, because you’re so fucking cryptic and vague and hard to read! Just say it! I need to know-”

“I like you.” Judai blurted, before looking down with that downtrodden half-smirk he always wore. “I’m sorry, I just, well, really like you.”

The teapot began to whistle and Judai jumped, immediately scrambling to take it off the stove. Manjoume took a step back, leaning dizzily into the counter. Well, there was his answer.

He watched quietly as Judai add the tea to the pot with an uneasy beet red face and wide nervous eyes. He sighed softly and finally turned back to Manjoume, staring for a moment before his face split into a relieved grin and he choked out a laugh.

“What are you smiling about…” Manjoume huffed, regaining himself.

“Because you’re smiling.” Judai laughed. “That’s… good!”

Manjoume covered his face, starting to turn red himself if he hadn’t already. He didn’t even realize he was smiling. Judai’s beaming face softened.

“That is a good thing… right?”

“Y-yeah... “ Manjoume mumbled.

“So you like me…?”

Manjoume could only muster up a nod; even with everything going as right as it possibly could, it was still incredibly embarrassing for to admit it.

Suddenly he was scooped up into a crushing embrace. “What a relief! Now I don’t feel so weird about it!”

“That’s what you’re happy about?!” Manjoume yelped, trying to squirm away for a second before deciding he was too tired and dropping his chin onto Judai’s shoulder. His arms found themselves at Judai’s side and, after some deliberation, he hesitantly wrapped them around Judai’s waist and buried his nose into Judai’s neck- something he had thought about a shameful amount ever since he saw Johan do it. Judai pulled him closer, though his hold no longer threatened to snap Manjoume’s bones. It was nice, honestly.

“So whatdya wanna do today?” Judai mumbled into Manjoume’s hair.

“You just can’t keep the mood, can you?”  
  
“I’ve been told it was never my forte.”

“Tch. I just wanna relax. I’m tired.”

“We can just stay in and duel all day.”

“I need a break, honestly.”

“Takeout?”

“That sounds nice.”

Judai finally loosened his hold entirely and moved his hands to Manjoume’s shoulders- god, could Manjoume just die as he remembered the last time he did that- and Manjoume reluctantly peeled himself away from Judai.

“Is this weird?” Judai cocked his head to the side.

Manjoume gave him another scowl, fighting back a laugh. “Of course it’s weird. This is the weirdest possible thing that could have happened.”

“But you look happy. So that’s a relief.” Judai finally pulled away entirely and went to pour their tea, almost as if nothing had happened all over again. This time, though, Manjoume just took a step closer and watched quietly. “Manjoume.”

“Mm?”

“You were jealous.”

“Don’t try to be smug about it.”

“That’s why you were always snapping at me, huh?” Judai slipped a mug into Manjoume’s hands. “You really were jealous.”

“Oh, shut up... “ The tips of their fingers brushed.

Judai snickered and took a long sip of his tea, not realizing it was still scalding hot.

\---

Nothing happened after that. Well, nothing of great romantic significance.

After breakfast, which he spent trying his best to look nonchalant as he basked in Judai’s cozy, triumphant smile, Manjoume locked himself in the bathroom and texted Asuka.

**“HE LIKSE ME”**

**“Yay that’s nice go gettum tiger”**

**“i havent thought this far ahead”**

**“Yeah you’ve never been in a relationship before huh”**

**“its not a relationship we just like eachother gah”**

**“Here we go”**

**“dont”**

**“MANJOUME GO GET HIM, HE’S GONNA BE YOUR BOYFRIEND”**

**“STOP”**

Before Asuka’s reply came, Manjoume’s ringtone blared loudly through the bathroom and he fumbled not to drop his phone into the toilet. He regained his composure and looked at the caller ID screen. It was his manager.

What followed was one loud curse, a reluctant phone call, a string of quieter curses, then Manjoume leaving the bathroom in a sulk and trudging over to Judai in living room. He was sprawled inviting on the couch petting Pharoah- which Manjoume would have protested had he been in a better mood.

“You okay? I heard yelling. Kind of.” Judai peeked at him curiously.

“I have to go.” Manjoume sighed, trying not to sound too upset. “I got challenged to some bullshit rivalry rematch and they want me to do it tomorrow, so I need to get ready today... “

He trailed off tiredly. Judai sat up, looking disappointed himself. “Jeez. That’s tough, huh... Your job.“

“I love dueling, and I _am_ the best.” Manjoume scoffed, “It’s the publicity part that’s a pain. It’s all about personas and rivalries. Sho is the only person I consider a rival. The rest are just pretend and it’s annoying.”

“I see.” Judai shot him an endearing look. Manjoume rolled his eyes and turned to head upstairs.

“So yeah, sorry. I gotta bounce.”

“Can I come?”

Manjoume paused and looked over his shoulder. “What? Like come and watch?”

“Yeah!” Judai stood up, sending Pharoah jumping off his lap. “I love watching you duel.”

A blush creeped onto Manjoume’s face. “Practicing isn’t as exciting to watch.”

“Doesn’t matter. I’ll give you a ride too, so you don’t have to worry about spending energy driving!” Judai practically bounced as he talked, like a little kid.

“On your piece of crap scooter? I could die!”

“C’mon.” Judai’s mouth slipped into a sly smile. “I know you want to.”

“H-huh?”

He grinned again. “Because you’re smiling!”

Manjoume’s hands flew to cover his mouth, face burning. This guy…

“You must not smile very much if you can’t even control it.” Judai tutted. “But anyway. it’s up to you. I won’t be pushy.”

“Fine, fine!” Manjoume grumbled and began upstairs. “But don't make me late!”

“Of course, sir.” Judai replied smoothly before bursting into a fit of laughter.

\---

Manjoume thought back to the first day Judai had returned. He remembered him- lying still in the hospital bed, standing awkwardly in his living room, frowning uncomfortably, averting his eyes from Manjoume. He remembered feeling uneasy toward Judai, unsure of what to do about the man he once knew but now was a silent stranger to him.

It was funny how they went from all that to Manjoume’s arms wrapped comfortably around Judai’s waist- or as comfortably as he could when clinging for his life- and heading resting between Judai’s shoulders as the wind whipped around him on their way to the stadium on Judai’s piece of crap scooter.

It was honestly hilarious.

 

( **DAY FOURTEEN)**

Even with just less than a day of preparation, Manjoume won the match, of course. He was the league champion after all.

But though he put on a good show, that was hardly what mattered to him. Despite Judai watching him the entirety of practice, Manjoume felt like he hadn’t seen him in days. Memories of the kitchen- of holding Judai as his face nuzzled against Manjoume’s hair- kept flashing through his mind as he tried to focus on cards and it was driving him _fucking crazy._

Manjoume pushed past a reporter to retreat to the dressing rooms, where, once out of sight, he finally slumped as he grabbed a towel. He was definitely taking a break after this. And possibly firing his manager. He made his way into his dressing room and perked as he saw Judai, who gave him that five thousand watt smile that melted away the tension that had been aching away in Manjoume’s chest. He felt himself smile too, and he quickly began to wipe away his makeup to hide it.

“Manjoume! That was so awesome!” Judai exclaimed. “That last combo gave me shivers! I’m all riled up now! Duel me!”

Admittedly Manjoume was still buzzing from the duel too- adrenaline perhaps. He finished wiping his face and gave Judai a smirk. “I may just take you up on that, but let’s get out of here first.”

“Ah, you’ve still got some makeup on your face!”

“O-oh,” Manjoume grimaced. Judai couldn’t let him be cool for just one second, could he? “Shut up- where?

“I’ll get it, okay?” Judai pulled the towel away from Manjoume before he could protest. “I gotcha.”

“Hmph. Thanks.” Manjoume pouted as Judai stepped closer and dabbed gently at his cheek. He watched Judai’s expression become stern and careful for a moment, as he wiped away the last of the blue lightning bolt from his face, before lightening again as his eyes met Manjoume’s. Their noses bumped clumsily as Manjoume realized just how close Judai was and his heart practically leapt.

“Yeah...” Judai said softly, nearly a whisper.

Adrenaline.

Judai swallowed and began to lean back, letting out a stupid laugh. “Oh! Sorry-”

“Screw it.”

It probably would have been safer to wait for their promised duel to blow off steam- Manjoume’s had to admit he could be very excitable. He wouldn’t call himself a risk taker, but history would probably prove otherwise. And would continue to.

He balled his fists into Judai’s jacket and tugged him forward as he leaned up and met his lips to Judai’s; he wasn’t met with any resistance, thankfully. It wasn’t a long kiss- short and passionate, like a spark. Or a flash of lightning.

Manjoume pulled away breathlessly before Judai could. The look on Judai’s face was priceless- Manjoume wasn’t sure if he had ever once seen a look of such genuine shock on Judai’s features. They stared at eachother for a few moments, breathing quick, soft breaths, before Judai licked his lips as they pressed into a giant smile.

“Awesome!”

“Awesome?!” Manjoume’s mouth quirked into an irritated grimace, betraying the ecstatic pounding of his heart. “That’s what you have to say?”

He couldn't be happier.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> a comic of the kiss can be found here!!: http://ask-futuregx.tumblr.com/post/118500199073/it-was-the-heat-of-the-moment-until-judai


	6. one day like this

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> pure fluff tbh

“I-I kiss you and that’s all you have to say?!” Manjoume sputtered. “You idiot-”

Judai grasped Manjoume’s waist and yanked him forward into another kiss, this time longer. Deeper. Manjoume immediately relaxed and pulled Judai closer before he wrapped his arms around Judai’s neck. Judai only pulled away when Manjoume let out an undignified squeak at the sudden intrusion of Judai’s tongue.

“Sorry,” he chuckled, running his thumb over Manjoume’s lip gently.”But is that more what you wanted…?”

Manjoume swallowed, completely ignoring how burning hot his face felt. Judai’s voice was lower than usual, almost a rough growl and _oh god, how dare he_. Manjoume simply nodded, exhaling softly as Judai’s hand dragged down his cheek before falling away completely.

“Y-yes, that will do.” He finally mumbled after he pulled back his own hands, pursing his lips so that Judai didn’t catch him smiling like an idiot again.

They left separately- Manjoume hitched a ride from his manager after shooing Judai away to his bike- at Manjoume’s insistence. Even in the whirlwind rush of emotions, he knew better to let the press catch wind of Judai- not yet anyway. He thought about that for a moment, staring out the window of his manager’s car. He had seen the comments on websites, he knew people were, well, attracted to him, interested- he was sought after, ironically.

And now he wasn’t single.

He hurried inside after his manager dropped in off to find Judai, much to his relief, lounging patiently on the couch with an inviting smile. Manjoume slid into the seat beside him, right into Judai’s open waiting arms.

“Where were we?” Judai purred.

It was strange. Manjoume didn’t really imagine things happening like this, but he wasn’t complaining.

  
  


**(DAY FIFTEEN)**

During the previous night’s ride home, Manjoume did make the effort to throw a few thin threats at his manager to let him have a break. Admittedly it would have been the smart thing to have asked for time off much earlier in the Judai Experience™ but logic hadn’t been the asset that got Manjoume this far in life.

After a brief shaking down, Manjoume got at least a week of no matches or practice.

A week with Judai. Manjoume squirmed in his bed at the thought, freezing when he heard his phone buzz. He poked his head out from under the covers to see his phone screen- it was after ten, an unusual time for Manjoume to still be in bed, and Asuka’s name was on his screen. He took a breath before he answered the phone.

“Congrats.” Asuka said quickly.

“What are you talking about,” Manjoume grumbled.

“Sho saw you and Judai making out. Congratulations.”

“Are you fucking kidding me?” Manjoume ran his hand down his face. “He saw?”

“Hey, he’d find out eventually. Anywho, I told you it would work out. How’s it going with him? I’m not interrupting anything am I?”

“Nothing other than me sleeping in for once.”

“Not with him?”

“No!” Manjoume huffed, rolling onto his side. “He’s downstairs. I guess.”

“But I thought you two were hitting it off?”

“We did. Are. We…” Manjoume felt a blush creep onto his face. “After the duel yesterday, we just came back here and, y’knoooow. N-not s-sex I mean, but- but yeah. But then we just went to sleep. And that’s not a complaint.”

“Yeah, sure.” Asuka laughed. “But that sounds nice. You sound happy.”

“Y-yeah.” Manjoume sunk into his pillow. “It’s weird.”

“Like before?”

“No, but, I mean. I feel all funny being with him.” He sighed airily. “It’s Judai. It will always be weird.”

“Funny, huh?” Asuka chuckled, sounding a bit more sincere. “I suppose so. But you’re weird. And life’s weird. So whatever.”

“Yeah.” Manjoume finally rose from the nest of blankets on his bed. “Whatever”

 

\---

When he finally, lazily made his way downstairs, Manjoume was surprised to catch the scent of home cooked food wafting in from the kitchen. He peeked into the kitchen and lo and behold, there was Judai cooking him breakfast in only his underwear and Manjoume took a deep breath to keep his heart from exploding at that sight.

Judai glanced over his shoulder briefly to flash Manjoume a grin. “Mornin’.”

“Morning.” Manjoume shuffled into the kitchen, at a loss. “What are you doing…”

“Cooking, silly.” Judai replied casually.

“Don’t be coy. You never cook.” Manjoume snapped, before he softened slightly. “A-and you know you don’t have to.”

“Come on, it’s the least I can do after staying here for, I dunno. However long.” He shrugged and shot Manjoume a sly smile. “And I wanna do something for you, especially.”

“Don’t try to make breakfast food sexy ‘cause it really isn’t.” Manjoume grumbled, blushing anyway.

“Are you calling me sexy?”

“I kissed you, didn’t I?” Manjoume quipped back without thinking. “Eh, I mean- whatever.”

“Touche.” Judai laughed and finished preparing the plates. Breakfast appeared to an odd mix of Japanese and American style cooking-  nothing gourmet at all but… endearing. Better that Manjoume’s usual breakfast- a cup of tea and maybe some bread if he felt generous- so he definitely couldn’t criticize.

“It looks good.” Manjoume nodded in approval. “I’m impressed with how resourceful you were with my kitchen.”

“That’s the life of a traveller.” Judai nodded back. “I know my way around a campfire.”

He quickly burst into laughter as he sat down and, though he shook his head and rolled his eyes at Judai’s neverending lameness, Manjoume smiled. That seemed to please Judai, who fell silent after a moment with an adoring simper. Manjoume bit his lip self consciously, faltering.

“Stop making a big deal everytime I make a face.” He growled, covering his mouth.

“N-no, sorry!” Judai sputtered. “Eat!”

Manjoume huffed and began eating his food. It wasn’t the best thing he had ever tasted- not by a long shot- but it was still perfectly fine. Well, some parts were a little burnt, but thought of Judai getting up early and cooking it made him feel happy.

Judai nibbled on his own good, eying Manjoume eagerly. “Y’know, I’m not trying to make fun of you or anything.”

“What are you talking about?” Manjoume said flatly.

“When you smile.”

“Hmph. Then stop pointing it out. It’s embarrassing.”

“No, don’t be embarrassed.” Judai whined. “I can’t help it. You have a really beautiful smile.”

Manjoume nearly choked on his rice. “Eh?”

Judai chuckled, cheeks pink. “I love your smile. Your rare smile.”

“Y-you’re such a sap-”

“And your dimples are so cute-”

Manjoume dropped his chopsticks. “Stop! Just stop!”

“I mean it.” Judai tilted his head. “I’m complimenting you.”

“It’s so embarrassing! I’m a grown man.”

“Yes.” Judai nodded. “Still cute.”

Manjoume flicked a stray grain of rice at Judai, earning a dorky laugh. “Don’t patronize me!”

“I’m not. I’m one hundred percent sincere.” Judai smirked. “Wouldn’t you say the same about me?”

“Cute? You? Hell no.”

Judai laughed in manner that was absolutely not adorable and Manjoume wasn’t able to stop his mouth from quirking into a shy smile.

\---

The day was surprisingly mundane for a day spent with Judai. A couple texts from Rei and Jim were ignored and they mostly lounged around as Judai seemed to have noticed Manjoume’s desire to just stay at home for once; that didn’t stop him challenging Manjoume to a duel nine or ten times but when Manjoume finally relented, even that was oddly simple. Just cards on a table, Judai rapidly explaining away the effect of an Elemental Hero that Manjoume hadn’t seen before in a quiet, serious voice and with a smile on his face. Manjoume glanced between the cards cluttered on the table and Judai’s relaxed face. His sharp eyes. The corners of his lips turned upward into a playful sneer as he explained that Manjoume’s lifepoints had dropped to zero.

_Wait._

Manjoume felt himself pale as he watched Judai gather up his cards. When Judai finally noticed the silence, he looked up from his deck shuffling and gasped. “W-what’s up, Manjoume?”

“N-nothing.” Manjoume gritted his teeth, covering his face.

“You looked shocked.” Judai raised an eyebrow. ”Surprised I won?”

“I-- A little.” Manjoume pouted. “I haven’t lost a duel in the last four years, so I forgot what it was like to lose.”

Judai snickered. “That’s a pretty poor attitude. You sound spoiled”

“No, no. I’m… I’m glad you won.”

“Yeah?”

“It means I have something new to strive for!” Manjoume shot Judai a menacing glare. “Your defeat.”

“You still couldn’t beat me after seven years, though.” Judai taunted.

“I think you’re a thousand times cockier than me. You’re awful.”

“I’m kidding!”

Manjoume rolled his eyes and organized his cards. Out of the corner of his eye he saw Judai’s shadow move and when he looked up, mere centimeters separated Judai’s face from his own as Judai leaned over the coffee table. “Maybe you’d beat me if you weren’t distracted.”

Despite his initial surprise, Manjoume calmly raised a finger over Judai’s mouth, causing him to grow quiet with a strangely obedient gaze.

“Cocky.” Manjoume said flatly. “You’re cocky.”

He had no plans of letting Judai beat him at everything.

\---

“Let’s go out,” Judai mumbled as he nuzzled Manjoume’s neck. Manjoume groaned and straightened himself up on the couch, careful not to let Judai fall from his lap despite the persistent over-affection he had been showering Manjoume with for the past hour.

“You’re like a cat.” Manjoume grumbled, turning off the television. “And I’m already in my pajamas.”

“Your pajamas are fashionable. Let’s go. I’m bored.” Judai rolled out of Manjoume’s lap and stood up in the middle of the living room. Manjoume contemplated the fading warmth on his legs.

“Fine, you get super annoying when you’re cooped out for too long anyway.”

Judai drove, and Manjoume pretended to grip when he slid onto the seat of the scooter but he couldn’t keep himself from blushing when Judai offered him the only helmet; he was grateful for the dark and the visor that hid his red face. It was after ten, and the side streets were quietly and still aside from Judai’s sputtering bike. Manjoume held Judai’s waist tightly, pressing their bodies flush together.

They drove to the Domino Piers and parked on the sidewalk. There was hardly anyone around as Judai took Manjoume’s hand and led him near the water. They sat on the edge of a pier in the brisk evening air and Manjoume pulled the jacket he tossed on over his pajamas closer to his body. Judai seemed unphased, kicking his feet a little as the dangled off the pier’s edge.

“The the sound of the ocean is so relaxing.” Judai mused. “I miss it when I’m somewhere that’s landlocked.”

“It reminds me of school.” Manjoume sighed.

“Yeah. That’s part of why I like it sometimes.”

“You don’t say...”

“Hey, Manjoume?”

“Yeah?”

“Did you like me during school?”

“No. Did you like me?”

“It’s hard to say. I guess not.”

“Funny.” Manjoume’s voice wavered with a shiver. “How this unfolded.”

Judai just nodded and put an arm around Manjoume, pulling him close. Manjoume’s head bumped against Judai’s chin before burrowing below it; Judai was surprisingly warm despite his much lighter jacket.

Manjoume never gave much thought to Judai in school- sure they had a special relationship, namely one that yo-yoed between friendly rivalry and pure annoyance, but Manjoume had been far too busy fawning over Asuka to give Judai any real consideration. He could remember how he used to feel about Asuka, how he fell for her so suddenly and desperately wanted her to return his feelings. Deep down he knew she never would, but he was almost okay with that. It made her easier to love in a strange way, since there was hardly anything to risk. He couldn’t lose her; he never had her.

Judai was so different. Manjoume had fallen for him like a stone in the ocean, barely even realizing it. And Judai felt the same. And now they were together on a pier at night, searching for warmth in each other and Manjoume never wanted Judai to pull away. But he knew back in the guestroom- which was for _guests_ \- Judai had a backpack’s worth of belongings light enough to carry on his back and take anywhere, as far away from that moment as he could get.

Manjoume heart pounded so loudly in his chest that he could barely hear the waves, and each beat sent an ache through his entire body.


	7. sloppy seconds

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i think i'll be wrapping this up another three or four chapters so i promise future updates will be quite riveting!! but in the meantime, this
> 
> also skipped writing it but this comic- http://dilfosaur.tumblr.com/post/107871156083 - takes place before this chapter. since it's already its own long comic i figured i didn't need to rewrite it aaaaye

**(DAY SEVENTEEN)**

“Jun!” Judai called across the front room of Asuka’s condo. “I’m gonna go, I’ll see you at home!”

Manjoume’s head shot up at the name, completely tearing him away from his conversation with Asuka and Jim. Judai had only begun calling him by his first name the night before- he insisted since Manjoume always had called him by his first name, and kissed Manjoume until he relented. It was still a strange moment every time that name left Judai’s lips; hearing his first name coming from Judai made him feel very vulnerable. It was strangely intimate.

Good thing Judai did it so openly in front of _their fucking friends_.

“O-of course.” Manjoume stammered, ignoring the burning sensation of Asuka and Jim’s stares boring into him. “See ya.”

Judai just waved cutely before scampering off, leaving Manjoume red faced in the wake of the Crocodile Man and the Ice Queen.

“First names!” Asuka cooed. “How special.”

“Just adorable.” Jim snickered.

“Shut up!” Manjoume hissed. “It’s nothing special! It’s not cute.”

“We all know you two hooked up, okay?” Asuka waved her hand dismissively. “You don’t have to be defensive.”

“You people have no respect for privacy! I can’t believe this!”

“It just really,” Jim shrugged, with that lopsided grin of his. “It’s admirable. And funny. You two, of all people.”

“Yeah, yeah. Never heard that one before. Definitely never thought that myself-”

Jim chuckled. “Thunder, you’re smiling.”

Manjoume covered his face with an embarrassed hiss. Asuka and Jim just laughed harder before Asuka cleared her throat and gave Manjoume a knowing look.

“He called your place ‘home’.”

“It’s a figure of speech.” Manjoume grumbled, curling his fingers tighter around his face at the pang of happiness he felt at that.

“I’m happy for you.” Asuka smiled sweetly. “Are you going too now?”

“It’s fine,” Manjoume shook his head, watching Jim excuse himself to get another drink. “We spent like the last two days alone, I don’t want to, uh, smother him.”

True, the last two days were honestly very happy ones and not uncomfortable at all; between just relaxing at home and Judai dragging him out on some spur of the moment date then following him upstairs and lying beside him and kissing him and whispering- Manjoume shook his head to clear away those thoughts- but between all that, Manjoume was happy. Perhaps the happiest he had been in a long time.

Still, Manjoume couldn’t shake the dull sadness that ached in his chest every time Judai pulled away. The was a part of him that knew it was wrong to spend so much time with Judai. He hadn’t forgotten that Judai being around was really just a temporary thing, and he’d miss him terribly once he left. So when Asuka invited them to a house party to, as she put it, “stop flirting (since i know youre not fucking) long enough to actually see your other friends”, Manjoume knew he had to go. He had to remember a world without Judai.

“Understandable,” Asuka’s word snapped Manjoume back to reality. “You okay? You look spacey.”

Manjoume swallowed, face rapidly turning red. “I… I really like Judai.”

His voice was hoarse, and Asuka’s smirk softened into a sympathetic smile. “No kidding. You totally scared off Jim.”

Across the room, Jim had definitely moved onto to talking with Sho. Manjoume rolled his eyes and whined. “I don’t know what to do.”

“Well,” Asuka mused. “You could make him fall madly in love with you so he doesn’t leave…”

“Shut up. Like that’s gonna happen.”

“Or you could just enjoy hanging out with people right now and not worry. I mean, are you two being really serious? Did he say?”

“N-no.” Manjoume pursed his lips thoughtfully.”He doesn’t say much of anything about what we’re doing.”

“Well, then you have to find out where you stand, for starters.”

“I’m not stupid, Asuka. I know that.”

“Then why are you still waffling around about it?”

Manjoume sighed heavily, lowering his head sheepishly. “Because what if his answer isn’t the one I want...”

Asuka tilted her head. “You’re usually a lot confident than that. To me it seems like he really likes you, but I guess you know better.”

She gave Manjoume’s shoulder a reassuring squeeze. “Just do something before it’s too late.”

Manjoume flashed her a tight smile as she moved to rejoin Jim, grumbling under his breath. “What if it was always too late...”

\---

“I’m home-” Manjoume’s voice trailed off as he spotted a now-familiar set of boots beside the door, placed neatly beside the ratty pair of hiking boots that belonged to Judai. He took off his own shoes and quietly made his way to the Judai’s room. As he neared the cracked open door, Judai’s voice, low and soft, caught his ear faintly.

“I just don’t know what to tell him, y’know? I really like him. A lot. So I don’t wanna hurt him.”

Manjoume swallowed thickly, stomach twisting. _Hurt me, huh?_

After a silent moment, Manjoume finally knocked weakly on Judai’s doorframe. “Hey, I’m home.”

He heard scrambling and Judai quickly emerged from the room. “Hey Jun! I missed you!”

“I’m sure.” Manjoume watched as Johan sheepishly walked out into the hallway as well. “Ah, Johan. I didn’t see you leave Asuka’s early.”

“Yeah.” Johan offered an overly cheery smile. “I might go back if the party’s still going on.”

“It is.” Manjoume said, flatter than intended. “What have you two been up to?”

“Just talking.” Judai guffawed stupidly.

“It’s true,” Johan’s smile softened, as if trying to be more sincere. “Don’t worry. I swear, he’s all yours.”

Manjoume huffed, cheeks growing red as Johan passed him to retrieve his shoes.

“Thank you for the hospitality, Manjoume!” He called out as he hurriedly left. “See you both later!”

Manjoume only glowered at the entrance for probably a few moments longer than he should have.

“Jun.”

Admittedly, Manjoume’s heart still fluttered at the name and he turned back to Judai, only to be caught in a kiss. He made a soft, surprised noise as Judai broke the kiss pressed his forehead to Manjoume’s. He seemed an odd mix of relieved and miffed.

“You don’t have to be jealous of Johan.” Judai pouted. “You know that.”

Manjoume blinked, then narrowed his eyes as the irritation flooded back into him.“Of course I know. I don’t care.”

“But you’re upset.”

Manjoume just bit his lip stubbornly, letting out a long, hissing sigh. “You just spend so much time with him.”

“I spent just as much with you, if not more!” Judai groaned, running a hand through his hair exasperatedly. “He’s my best friend!”

“You dated him!” Manjoume snapped.

“And now I’m dating you!”

Manjoume froze, mouth quirking into a wary smile. “Is that… what we’re doing?”

“Isn’t it? Isn’t that what people do?” Judai sighed exasperatedly, slapping his hand against forehead. “Jeez, this is why I need to ask Johan for advice-”

“Stop talking about Johan.” Manjoume grumbled, reaching up and pulling Judai’s hand away from his now pink forehead. “Are you calling me your boyfriend?”

With only a slight hesitation, Judai nodded.

“It’s not a title to be taken lightly.”

“I’m sure.” Judai’s fingers curled around Manjoume’s. “I think I can handle it.”

“Prove it.” Manjoume said sternly.

Judai smirked and leaned in, catching Manjoume in a deep kiss; before Manjoume could react, Judai pulled away kissed the corner of Manjoume’s mouth, then a trail down his jaw. His hands felt their way down to Manjoume’s rear, squeezing gently before swiftly lifting Manjoume up. Manjoume flailed indignantly and kicked his feet as they left the ground, quickly surrendering to wrapping his legs around Judai’s and clinging to Judai’s shoulders. His face burned red as he held onto Judai helplessly; his entire body was quickly growing hot.

Judai buried his face in Manjoume’s neck, scattering kisses around his collarbone before focusing on a spot on the soft curve where his neck met his shoulders. Manjoume gasped loudly.

“H-holy shit,” Manjoume sputtered, though it came out as nearly a moan. “Put me down!”

Judai finally pulled away, their bodies sliding against each other as he lowered Manjoume gently back onto his feet. Manjoume rubbed his neck as he steadied himself again. “Did you fucking give me a hickey? How old are you?”

“I just want to be clear,” Judai shot him a triumphant grin. “When it comes to boyfriends, I’m all yours.”

“S-shouldn’t it be the other way around then?”

“Oh, you wanna give me one?” Judai immediately began to unzip the collar of his shirt.

“Seriously?” Manjoume eyed Judai’s neck; he’d be lying if he said he didn’t want to. “You’re too nonchalant, it’s incredibly unappealing.”

“It only makes sense, I guess.” Judai bared his neck to Manjoume with an inviting smile.

Manjoume sighed exasperatedly, despite the tightness of his chest and weakness of his legs. “Sit down. I’m tired of standing.”

Judai collapsed onto the couch and Manjoume followed, squirming on top of him until he was comfortable. A few more moments passed and he examined the bruise that had blossomed on Judai’s neck, in between pressing lazy, soft kisses to the mark. A laugh rumbled in Judai’s chest, shaking softly against Manjoume’s pounding heart.

“Why does this feel like we just sealed some kind of weird deal?” Manjoume mused, his body finally relaxing some.

“Didn’t we? I dunno. We’re just having fun.” Judai laughed again and put an arm around Manjoume’s waist.

“I can’t disagree with you there.” Manjoume settled, resting his head over the mark he just made. “Judai.”

“Jun.”

Manjoume’s lip quirked, but he still gave Judai a serious look. “Don’t talk to Johan about me. Talk to me about me.”

Judai lolled his head to the side, looking guilty. “Sorry. You just… you make me nervous.”  
  
“Why’s that?”

“I don’t wanna say the wrong thing to you. You can be scary!” Judai stuck out his tongue when Manjoume shot him a glare at that. “Well, no, I mean… You’re a lot gentler than you used to be. I…”

Manjoume watched as the thoughtful expression on Judai’s face lightened to his usual smug self and his lips parted to give some cute remark. Manjoume swallowed and his heart skipped a beat as he cut Judai off instead. “What did you mean you didn’t want to hurt me?”

A soft gasp left Judai and the ease melted away from his face. “W-what? Were you listening? That’s nosy!”

“It’s your own fault for being so busy with Johan that you didn’t hear me come in!”

Judai sighed, squirming slightly beneath Manjoume. “I think you could probably guess what my concerns are, and all that.”

Manjoume sighed, trying not to sound too disappointed. “Your, uh, travels.”

“Yeah...”

“How inconvenient.”

“Well, yeah.” Judai gave him a sincere smile. “Of course I wanna go back to the open road. But, y’know... “

“Hm?”

“You.”

Manjoume bit his lip, mostly to hold in the stupid smile he almost broke into at that. “I guess… we’ll figure that out in time.”

“Thanks.” Judai craned his neck up to give Manjoume a peck on the cheek and Manjoume relaxed, feeling calmer. “What do you want to happen, Jun?”

“What do you think, numbskull?”

“I want to hear you say it.” Judai purred.

“Tough.” Manjoume feigned a scowl. “Stop trying to tell me what to do.”

“Mmm, fine. Jun. Show me a smile.”

Manjoume did, but not because Judai asked.

 

**(DAY NINETEEN)**

It was actually Judai who managed to corral everyone into a restaurant for hot pot, insisting it was something he always wanted to do with a bunch of people so they might as well do it together at least once before they all split up again. Everyone of course agreed- after all, it was Judai’s request and he was kind of the guest of honor, right? So of course Manjoume and Judai arrive together and no one really addresses that, and Judai ends up sitting not quite across the table from Manjoume in between Shou and Kenzan; since Manjoume had him all to himself at home and griped about being affectionate in public, why bother trying to sit with him, right?

And that’s how Manjoume found himself sitting beside Johan all of dinner. Rei was on his other side, but she was far too preoccupied fawning over Kenzan to offer him much relief. Manjoume nibbled at his food quietly; he didn’t feel very resentful toward Johan, in fact he felt a bit guilty for always snapping at him, but it wasn’t unreasonable to have complicated feelings about his boyfriend being so close to his ex.

It would be wrong to be stand-uppish though, so of course Manjoume tried his best to keep small talk with him. The latest with Johan’s work at KaibaCorp, Manjoume’s duel career and the break he was on, the weather. It was a disappointingly short time until they wandered onto the subject of Judai.

“Manjoume.” Johan cleared his throat. “I feel like things are kind of weird between us.”

“I suppose you could say that.” Manjoume finally faced him. He and Johan were never very good friends, but their relationship definitely became stale after Judai was thrown into the mix. “Sorry. By the way.”

“Eh, can’t say I’m surprised.” Johan smiled kindly. “It’s certainly an unusual situation we have here!”

“Y-yeah.” Manjoume took another bite of food. “I just… I get jealous, okay?”

Johan chuckled, earning him a scowl from Manjoume. “Sorry, I understand entirely. It’s just funny because when we hang out, Judai just goes on and on about you!”

“You don’t say…” Manjoume softened, though still trying his best to have a cool demeanor.

“Mhm. All this time he was either going on about how nice you were to him, or how big a crush he had and you, and now how much he likes you.” Johan smirked. “He’s quite taken with you.”

“You don’t have to flatter me. He says he asks you for advice often.”

“Well, yes. He’s still pretty clueless about people.” Johan’s smile faltered for the first time, and Manjoume raised an eyebrow.

“Tell me about him. You know him so well, and you dated him too.”

“Fair.” Johan chuckled, his smile still dark and voice softening. “Judai is, well, a very guarded person. As you may have noticed. I mean, he very righteous and wants to help everyone around him, but I think he’s still a lot more haunted by his past than he wants to admit. Because of that he’s become kind of a loner. It’s kind of contradictory.”

Manjoume nodded slowly, the background voices of the rest of the group seeming to fade away as he continued listening to Johan.

“Judai has his own agenda and he’s very stubborn. I couldn’t stay with Judai because he didn’t give any thought to the future- mine or his. It’s troublesome, especially since we were getting older. I don’t think that’s changed much. He’s still a complete wild card.”

“Why,” Manjoume swallowed. “Why does it feel like you’re warning me about him?”

Johan laughed weakly. “I guess I am. He’s worried about hurting you one way or another but I feel like he’d do it anyway. I mean, you know Judai. He’s not a bad person, but he’s difficult to tie down. You’re an admirable person, Manjoume. I’m being open and honest with you.”

“Thanks, I suppose.” Manjoume gnawed at his lip. “What am I supposed to do with all this information? You’re really making me worried.”

“Sorry. Just be direct with him, I guess. He’s not very straightforward so you have take that role. I think that’s no problem for you, Manjoume.”

“I guess not.”

“Hey. His lifestyle doesn’t suit you, does it? I can’t imagine you going with him, so would you be okay with him leaving?”

Manjoume paused, picking at his napkin. “Probably not. But it would depend on some things.”

“Like what?”

“Him coming back.”

“You’d wait?”

“... Yes. Not forever but, right now, probably.”

Johan grinned. “Manjoume, who would have thought that between the two of us, you were the patient one!”

“I could change my mind.” Manjoume shrugged, leaning back in my seat. “Thanks for the advice. I supposed Judai was right about that- you and advice.”

Johan leaned back as well, smile fading again. “Years of dealing with him.”

Manjoume watched him. “One last thing?”

“Go ahead.”

“Do you still have feelings for Judai?”

Johan’s eyes widened for a moment, then he snorted. “I’ll always have a special bond with Judai. He’s my very best friend, and I want him to be happy.”

Manjoume knitted his brows at that, but Johan gave him a reassuring smile.

“You make him happy. Trust me.”

Manjoume nodded, and Judai finally turned away from the rest of the group and beamed at them from across the table. “Look at you two talking! Awesome!”

Manjoume just gave him a small smile.

Judai did look really happy, so Manjoume decided to leave it at that.


	8. shut up and dance with me

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is the beginning of the end guys.
> 
> (bear with me for weird pacing)

**(DAY TWENTY TWO)**

The novelty of Judai and Manjoume’s relationship seemed to finally be wearing away amongst their friends, and Manjoume no longer stopped Judai from sitting close beside him or letting their hands touch casually. Even a quick kiss or two went without complaint or even much acknowledgement besides maybe a quiet double-take.

Manjoume sighed contently at the weight of Judai’s shoulder on his; he should have stopped caring sooner.

“So what’s a blacklight party?” Judai tilted his head to the side like a child, hair brushing against Manjoume’s ear. Manjoume snorted in his direction, but otherwise leaned comfortably against Judai.

Rei grinned at him from across Sho’s kitchen table. “It’s just a party, with blacklights! You wear glow in the dark stuff and face paint and it’s fun! And don’t worry, there will even be dueling events!”

“Sounds like a steaming, hot mess.” Manjoume pushed up his glasses with a sharp smirk. “Isn’t that type of thing for teenagers?”

“I’ve never been able to go to one these! And I’m still a young girl!” Rei whined. “Asuka said she’s coming!”

“Jim and Kenzan are too.” Sho added as he joined them at the table. “I think Johan might come if he doesn’t have to work.”

“Seriously? You’re all a bunch of party animals!”

“You’re one to talk, Jun.” Judai tutted. “With all your pro league parties.”

Manjoume’s face turned red as the memory of the last party's _incident_ flashed through his mind. “Shut it.”

“Judai! You never even came to one of the pro league parties!” Rei curled her fingers into determined fist, causing Judai to sit up with a soft, startled squeak. “So you have to come!”

“Um.” Judai pursed his lips thoughtfully, then sighed. “Yeah, okay. It sounds kind of neat.”

Sho laughed uncertainly as Rei threw her fist into the air. “Yes! Judai and Manjoume confirmed for coming!”

“Hey, I didn’t say I was coming.” Manjoume growled.

Rei just stuck her tongue out playfully. “You’re Judai’s date so it’s a given. I’ll text you the deets.”

Manjoume just rolled his eyes and glanced at Judai, who shot him a bright, reassuring smile. “It’ll be fun! Especially if you come.”

He snorted warily, grumbling under his breath. “I’m so tired of parties.”

\---

“I can’t believe you said yes to that stupid blacklight party!” Manjoume yelled- though to be fair, he had to for Judai to hear him over the roar of his scooter’s engine and through the helmet. He gripped Judai’s waist tighter as they turned onto Manjoume’s street and Judai began to slow down.

“Why?” Judai yelled back. “Rei’s right- I haven’t been to any of these party things.”

The engine sputtered as they slowed to stop in front of Manjoume’s house, though Manjoume didn’t loosen his hold on Judai just yet. He leaned in and rested his chin on Judai’s shoulders as Judai removed his helmet, careful not to knock Manjoume away.

“You just don’t seem the type to enjoy that sort of thing.”

“She said there’d be dueling!”

“There’s always dueling. I could duel you.”

“You’d lose again.”

“Jerk.”

Judai snickered and pulled out of Manjoume’s grip, turning around to remove the helmet from Manjoume’s head. He ran a hand through Manjoume’s slightly matted hair and smiled brightly. “And you’ll be there, so if everything else sucks I’ll at least have that.”

Manjoume grimaced, doing his best not to melt right there on the spot. “If I must go.”

“You must.” Judai grinned dumbly, and Manjoume’s heart swelled at the sight.

  
  


**(DAY TWENTY FOUR)**

When the day of the dreaded party arrived, Manjoume found himself shuffling into a club that he didn’t bother to admit he’d been to before at least once, holding loosely onto Judai’s wrist; the others said they would just meet inside so Manjoume and Judai were left to their own devices for now.

“You can hold my hand, you know.” Judai offered, wiggling his fingers as they stepped into a dark walkway.

“It’s embarrassing.” Manjoume mumbled, letting his grip shift to Judai’s hands anyway.

They finally entered a large, open room awash in an unusual blue light. Judai looked around passively, drumming his fingers over Manjoume’s in time with the loud music that now filled Manjoume’s ears. Around them people talked and danced, brightly colored clothes and body paint glowing in the darkness.

“This is too much.” Manjoume said flatly, almost unintelligible over the music.

“I want to paint my face like that!” Judai looked around giddily, presumably just not hearing Manjoume above the racket all around them and hopefully not ignoring him. He pointed to a far corner of the room and tightened his hold of Manjoume’s hand. “There!”

“Seriously?” Manjoume whined as Judai dragged him over to the area that held several containers of paint and brushes that seemed free to be used. Though a couple people were doing their own paint, there were also several couples- or so Manjoume assumed- painting on eachother. Judai flashed Manjoume a giant grin and Manjoume was grateful for the dark lights, lest Judai see him blushing yet again.

“Paint on me, Jun.”

“I,” Manjoume shook his head. “I dunno what to do. This is silly! And unhygienic!”

“Just do whatever you want. I'm sure it's fine.” Judai nodded toward a couple that had discarded their tops for the sake of much more elaborate body painting. “Should I take my shirt off?”

“God, no! Don’t make a scene with me!” Manjoume barked, flustered. With a huff, he took a brush and made a few quick swipes across Judai’s cheeks. “There.”

“That was fast!” Judai whined, spinning around to check his face in one of the club’s many mirrored walls. “What the heck is this?”

“Whiskers?” Manjoume smirked as Judai examined the bright pink strokes on his reflections cheeks. “Like that dirty cat you hang out with.”

“Jeez. I wanted something cooler.”

“I’m insulted. I think it suits you.”

Judai’s pouting face broke into a smile as he brought a fist and flicked his wrist playfully. “Meow.”

“Please stop.” Manjoume sputtered, slapping his hand down bashfully. Judai just chuckled.

“Okay, then your turn.” Judai reached around him for a brush.

“No way. This is stupid!” Manjoume growled, though not resisting as Judai gently took hold of his chin.

“Everyone’s doing it. I did it.” Judai smiled gently, the painted whiskers twitching as his grin widened. “I want to paint your face.”

“...N-nothing stupid.”

“I think it’s obvious what to do.” Judai purred before falling silent as he began his work. Manjoume swallowed and just watched quietly, holding his breath as the cold paint met his face.

The focused look on Judai’s face was endearing, being so different from his usual obnoxiously lax demeanor. His tongue poked out slightly before retreating back into his mouth as Judai began to gnaw on his lower lip. His eyes were fixed on the tip of his brush, unblinking and pupils darting back and forth quickly only when he lifted the brush after a finished stroke. The only thing that stood out more than his admittedly cute face was something Manjoume wasn’t sure what to make of. He was more than familiar with Judai’s eyes by now, enough to have noticed the slight difference in color between them; though it was hard to tell, only really showing in certain lighting, one was a slightly yellower hazel than the other.

Underneath the blacklight, that eye was now a vibrant minty green. It glowed, like the paint or the clothes of strangers that blurred on the edge of Manjoume’s vision. His other eye was also glowing- a neon orange. Judai continued his painting, seemingly unaware to the unnatural brightness of his mismatched eyes. He finally paused, eyes scanning Manjoume’s face diligently before meeting Manjoume’s, squinted as he smiled, oblivious to their intensity.

"Done!" He chirped, proudly admiring his work.

“How did you get your eyes to do that?” Manjoume asked softly when Judai finally pulled the brush away from his face.

WIth a bemused look, Judai tilted his head. “Do what?”

“Glow... ?”

Judai’s eyes widened for a second before he laughed incredulously, only shrugging in response.

“Seriously! Are those contacts?” Manjoume brought a hand up to grasp Judai’s chin and bring him closer. Judai leaned in with a yelp, pouting innocently as Manjoume examined his still glowing eyes.

“Must be a trick of the light.” Judai offered, pulling back when Manjoume’s grip loosened.

“I just can’t get a straight answer out of you.” Manjoume grumbled dejectedly, but he perked as Judai grabbed his hand.

“If you say so. Ready?”

Manjoume nodded, catching a glimpse of the neon blue thunder bolt that was now gracing his face in the mirror as Judai led him away.

\---

It didn’t take long for them to get split up. They stayed very close at first, but never doing more than just putting a protective arm around the other in the crowd. Judai was reserved but kept getting distracted by some duel or someone’s clothes, and Manjoume got skittish when he spotted some people he knew from the league. They eventually separated when Judai found Sho and Manjoume was recruited by Asuka to help coax Rei down from dancing on a table. After that short scuffle, he collapsed onto a couch as Asuka handed him a drink.

“This is fun.” She mused nonchalantly. Her face wasn’t painted but her white dress glowed a soft purple under the lights. She clinked the edge of her glass to Manjoume’s.

“I guess. If you like partying with children.” He raised his glass to cheer before taking a long sip.

“Yeah, there’s a bunch of people here young enough to be my students.” Asuka took a drink of her own. “Awk-ward.”

Manjoume gave small laugh while scanning the room; Judai was gone from his sight, lost somewhere in a crowd of people dancing.

“Where’s Judai?” Asuka spoke up over the music, as if on cue.

“With Sho? I dunno.”

“How’s that going?”

“I dunno.” He took another long drink.

“So nothing new, huh?”

“Pretty much.”

Asuka raised an eyebrow but just nodded. “Alrighty then.”

Manjoume huffed and finished his drink in one long gulp, barely noticing the man approaching Asuka until he slid into the seat next to her to whisper something in her ear. Asuka laughed coyly and said something back that Manjoume couldn’t hear over the music. His face was painted to look like a skull- far too overdone for Manjoume’s tastes- that made him especially hard to recognize in the disorienting lighting; but eventually after Asuka finished typing something into his phone, he turned to Manjoume to flash a friendly though somewhat sheepish smile. Only then did Manjoume realize it was Jim, given away by the eyepatch. He was gone quickly, and Manjoume looked alertly at Asuka.

“What just happened?”

“Nothin’.” Asuka shrugged innocently.

“Wait,” Manjoume scooted closer, placing his empty glass down. “Are you dating Jim?”

“No.” Asuka said flatly. “You know I’m not interested in relationships. _You_ definitely know.”

“Does Jim know?”

“Yes, because unlike some people, I’m upfront about what I want from people. I don’t want to date Jim. I just want to mess around with him, and he’s known that from the get go.”

Manjoume raised his brow. “I… see.”

Asuka stretched her arm across the back of the couch, tilting her head toward Manjoume. “That’s the problem with Judai. You never talk to him about the serious stuff. You just let him do whatever he wants.”

“Thank you for continuously rubbing that in my face, yes.”

“Only because you still haven’t done anything. And I can tell you never stop worrying about it- not really.”

“I’ll do it! Jeez.” Manjoume grumbled, leaning back. “When the time is right. Right now I’m honestly more interested in you and Jim.”

“Jealous?” Asuka sneered.

“Actually, just leave me alone.”

“You’re a drag. But whatever, I have places to be.” Asuka stood up, graceful as ever, and smiled brightly as the disgruntled heap on the couch that was Manjoume. “See you later. Try to have some fun tonight, Thunder!”

He just stuck out his tongue as she walked away.

\---

Between the drinks and the lights and darting between dancing couples while avoiding dancing himself, Manjoume was tired. Exhausted, really. And to make matters worse, he still hadn’t found Judai again. He wouldn’t mind as much if Judai weren’t also his ride home; he wasn’t sure how much more face paint and pounding music he could handle.

Honestly, he was already definitely past his limit.

That was the sentiment that lead him to climbing up onto one of the bars. It wasn’t like there weren’t already several people dancing on the bar- including Rei, go figure- and though Manjoume wasn’t _that_ short, he still wasn’t tall enough to see clearly over the growing crowd. Judai couldn’t be too hard to find with his freaky eyes, after all. So up he went.

It was a little better to be standing above the neon masses and not feel trapped in the crowd anymore, but Manjoume quickly realized three things: one, his plan to spot Judai’s eyes was grossly simplistic and impossible to carry out when half the room seemed be glowing green and orange. Two: his arms where his sleeves cut off were feeling very cold now that they weren’t bumping against the occasional stranger. His whole body seemed to ache with a strange chill, alone atop the bar and without the one person he wanted most to see right then, at the very least.

And three: his own intoxication. Manjoume wavered slightly and he broke out of the trance that staring into the crowd had caused. He took a step to the side and shook his head frustratedly.

“...Judai!”

His yell barely stood out above the music and the talking and feet tapping and everything swirling around Manjoume. He groaned and took another step, far less thought out than his previous one.

His stomach sank as he felt his foot slip.

“Whoa!”

An undignified yelp escaped Manjoume as someone pulled him back to safety. He spun around wildly to see his savior, a small sliver of hope that maybe it was-

“You.” Manjoume’s voice fell flat.

“Me.” Johan smiled politely, the bright yellow star in his cheek twitching as he did. “You’re welcome.”

“What are you doing here?”

“I was invited just like everyone else!”

“No, I mean,” Manjoume nodded bashfully toward their feet. “Up here.”

“I saw you and thought maybe I should make sure you're alright. Guess I had the right instinct!” Johan winked, much to Manjoume’s chagrin. “What are you doing up here?”

“Looking for my boyfriend…” Manjoume sighed. “Have you seen him?”

“A while ago. He was with Kenzan. That guy is wasted!”

“Judai is…?”

“No, no, no. Judai doesn’t drink.”

“...Right.” Manjoume couldn’t even bother to hide his frown. _This guy._

“Sorry.” Johan offered, holding out a hand. “Do you need help getting down?”

“I'm fine.” Manjoume mumbled, looking apprehensively at the ground.

“Seriously, I don’t want you getting hurt.”

“Y’know, I don’t care what you want.”

Johan’s smile faltered and he took a step closer. “There you go. Acting angry again.”

“No! I just--” Manjoume took another unsteady step, prompting Johan to hold him by his shoulders. “I dunno.”

“Sorry, sorry. I don’t know what’s up with you and Judai but you don’t have to be angry with me, remember?”

Manjoume just pouted in response. Johan pulled him closer, continuing gently. "You're both my friends. We're friends, Manjoume."

“Yeah, we... are.” Manjoume relented. “I don’t know what’s happening with me and Judai either. You seem like you know him so well but even after everything that’s happened, I have no idea what he’s thinking or feeling or doing ever.”

“Please. I could never pin down Judai either. That’s why we broke up-”  Manjoume’s frown deepened at that and Johan shook his head embarrassedly. “Gah, I’m sorry! I really keep putting my foot in my mouth!”

“Whatever. I get it, you and him are super close. I know.” Manjoume leaned into Johan tiredly, wobbling a little as Johan did his best to steady him. “Sorry I snap at you. I'm just... tired.”

“No worries. I’ve told you before, you and Judai have my blessing.” Johan laughed sweetly, snaking an arm around Manjoume’s neck.

“I didn’t ask for you blessing.” Manjoume scowled as Johan tugged him closer. “Never needed it.”

“Well you have it anyway.” Johan continued, wrapping his other arm around Manjoume’s neck. “You two seem so happy. I’m jealous. Ironic, huh?”

Manjoume groaned, stomping his foot softly. “See, you can’t say things like that and expect me to not feel weird about you and Judai!”

“Come on! It’s not like that!!” Johan laughed loudly, doubling over so that he was practically leaning on Manjoume. He glanced up with an impish smirk. “Honestly? He’s the one I’m jealous of.”

Manjoume paused, wavering as the weight of Johan’s arms finally fell onto him, before flinching away with a bewildered sneer. “Are you kidding me right now?”

Johan pulled his hands back innocently. “Ah, come on. Just playing around.”

“How about you don’t--” Manjoume fell silent as he felt two admittedly familiar arms wrap around him from behind, pulling him into the most comfortable and relieving hold he felt all day.

“Johan…” Judai’s voice was a low, stern growl. Manjoume swallowed, watching silently while Johan shot them a cheeky grin.

“There you are.” He chuckled. “You shouldn’t abandon your boyfriend in a place like this.”

“I didn’t.” His voice softened as the words died out, as if he wasn’t entirely sure if he believed himself. Manjoume turned slightly to look at him, unable to fight away a smile.

“Judai,” was all he could really muster.

“Now that you’ve found each other, we should probably get down from here.” Johan mused. Manjoume blinked out of his stupor and noticed at least three people pointing phone cameras at the three of them. Heat exploded to his face as Judai let go of him briefly, only to rearrange his arms to hoist Manjoume over his shoulder.

“Judai!” Manjoume screamed, kicking indignantly as the calm brought on by Judai’s appearance dissipated entirely. “Put me the fuck down!”

Judai jumped off the bar nonchalantly, ignoring Manjoume’s struggling and the flash of a couple cameras. Manjoume whined softly as his body jolted when Judai landed, but gentle hands finally eased him back down to his feet. Manjoume glowered he steadied himself facing Judai, and Judai put his hands squarely on Manjoume’s shoulders.

“Was that really necessary?” Manjoume snapped.

“Hey, I didn’t want you getting hurt.” The look Judai gave him was sincere and the slightest bit concerned, which melted away some of Manjoume’s annoyance.

“You could’ve,” Manjoume lolled his head to the side shyly as his voice softened. “Not have carried me so roughly.”

“Do you prefer, what do you call it?” Judai smirked. “Bridal style?”

“You know what? Don’t you dare!”

Manjoume caught sight of Johan moving past them behind Judai; their eyes met for a moment and Johan gave him that enigmatic smile before mouthing what Manjoume could make out as, “you’re welcome”.

“You seem tired.” Judai commanded his attention once more.

“Generally. I told you, I’m sick of parties.” Manjoume ran a hand through his hair lazily. “What have you been up to?”

“Kenzan was super drunk.” Judai laughed wearily. “So he was talking to me a lot. And I dueled a couple people. It was fun.”

“Uh huh. I bet you made a real scene. Dueling.”

“Nah, I’m just a nobody. Nothing like you.” Judai took a deep breath, glowing eyes scanning over the room before falling back onto Manjoume. “Let’s get out of here.”

“Yeah?” Manjoume perked. “Fucking finally.”

“I mean it.” Judai’s grip on Manjoume’s shoulders tightened possessively. His voice lowered, so he leaned in close to Manjoume’s ear. “I’m dying to have you to myself again.”

Manjoume swallowed dryly, heart fluttering. “Then let’s go.”

\---

The ride home was silent. Manjoume felt light-headed, probably still due to the drinks and the exhaustion as well as the anticipation of finally being back in the comfort of his house with Judai. Judai drove- they were on his dingy bike after all- and Manjoume held tightly on Judai as they passed under the streetlights; the engine roared too loudly to bother with a conversation.

His hazy thoughts wandered.

He wondered what Asuka was up to. He thought about her in her white dress, chastising him for not talking to Judai. Why should it matter though? Judai made him happy- he made him feel good. _Except, well, when he didn’t._

His arms squeezed around Judai’s torso and the bike swerved softly to the right. Judai’s body was hot like fire in the brisk night wind and Manjoume wanted to be as close to him a possible.

He shivered.

“Jun.”

Manjoume blinked, realizing the bike was quiet and parked. Judai was looking back at him with a curious, waiting expression.

“I’ll seriously carry you if you need it.” It was just another one of Judai's snarky remarks, but there was an edge to Judai's voice that sent another chill down Manjoume's spine.

“No. Jeez.” Manjoume’s voice came out much softer than intended and he lazily pulled off his helmet. Judai’s fingers brushed his as he took the helmet from him.

A short walk. Manjoume unlocked the front door. Judai kicked off his shoes. They threw their coats onto the couch. Another short walk, stumbling upstairs. Judai shut the bedroom door, as if it mattered. Pharaoh, perhaps. Manjoume was pinned to the wall as Judai kisses him possessively; his guard was completely down and he doesn’t even complain when Judai finally made good on his need to pick Manjoume up. Judai brought him over to the bed and they kissed more, deeper. Manjoume’s legs wrapped around Judai’s waist. He felt good.

Judai always made him feel good.

“Jun…” Judai’s voice was low and distant, as if lulling Manjoume further into his daze.

_He could do whatever he wanted._

Manjoume inhaled quickly as everything around him suddenly sharpened and his mind suddenly sobered. His pants were sliding down his hips, his glasses were crooked. Judai’s hands were under his shirt and his tongue in his mouth, though they quickly retreated as Judai noticed how still Manjoume had become.

“Jun?”

Manjoume looked up at him. A worried look crossed Judai’s red face, nearing in hue to the smudged pink whiskers on his cheeks.

“Judai…” His voice shook. There was an anxiety churning deep in his chest, quickly growing. Manjoume couldn’t quite pin down what he was feeling.

Fear.

Sadness.

Anticipation.

_Anger._

“Jun? What’s wrong?” Judai’s voice was quick and steady despite his quickly wilting expression.

“Judai, I...”

Manjoume swallowed heavily, a shiver running down his body. Judai tried to move closer again, trying to cup Manjoume's face. That was the final straw.

“I can’t do this...!”


	9. stay, stay, stay

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> tw for references to self harm. very light and quick, but just a warning for anyone who may be sensitive to that ;u;

“I-I can’t do this!” Manjoume stuttered nervously, practically pushing Judai off of him. Judai scrambled backwards with a panicked look on his face.

“S-sorry!” Judai bit his lip, pushing back his hair. “What’s wrong?”

“I can’t take our relationship any further until we talk about it!” Manjoume straightened his shirt frantically, a sudden anger bubbling up inside of him. “I can’t live not knowing what’s happening between between us!”

“What do you mean what’s happening? We’re dating!”

“Stop acting stupid!” Manjoume voice was nearing a shrill yell. “You’re not going to stay with me! You’re going to leave again!”

Judai’s eyes widened as his lips pressed into a quivering, tight grimace. “I…”

“What do you want with me Judai?” Manjoume caught his breath as his throat was already beginning to feel rough. “I need to know.”

Judai’s eyes flickered down nervously, then quickly up again to Manjoume with a childlike, guilty gleam. “I want this.”

“This?” Manjoume scoffed, gesturing between the two of them as his voice rose again. “This is two people fooling around and knowing in the back of their minds that it’s not serious! This is nothing!”

“N-no, it’s not.” Judai gnawed at his lip defensively, brows furrowing.

“Whatever this is,” Manjoume growled. “I don’t want _this_!”

“Then what do _you_ want?” Judai snapped, though not with much ferocity.

A shaky breath caught in Manjoume’s throat as he choked out what he’d been wanting to say since they first kissed, if not longer. “I want you to stay, Judai.”

Any anger that was forming on Judai’s features melted away to awestruck, then back again to guilty. “Stay here?”

“Of course here!” Manjoume sighed loudly. “You’re already here now, it’d be so easy-”

“I can’t just settle here…”

“Why not? We’re only getting older and you can’t just wander around forever and- and I’m here!”

“Jun.” Judai pushed his hair back again, face twisting with remorse for a moment. “I like traveling. I like that lifestyle. I don’t know if I can stop.”

Manjoume gave an empty laugh. “Try. Just try for me!”

“Why can’t you come travel with me?” Judai shot back, his shaky voice lined with the thinnest hope. “Come with me!”

“I can’t do that! Judai, I built a life here- I fucking worked my ass off all by myself to get here! I won’t give it up for-”

“What, for me?” Judai’s voice finally rose to watch Manjoume’s. “They why do you expect me to change my entire life to suit you?”

Manjoume was taken aback for a moment to see Judai upset but quickly regained himself. “It’s easy for you! Literally all your worldly possessions are in my house already! Just start a life here!”

“It’s not about possessions!”

“And it’s not about me either!” Manjoume snorted. “I was right about ‘this’.”

“Shut up.” Judai glowered at him. “You know I care about you.”

“Yeah? Really? Prove it.”

“I haven’t? How on earth do I do that then?”

Manjoume gave him a sardonic laugh. “If staying is so out of the question, I’m sure you can come up with some grand gesture. I’ve seen you do some crazy shit for Johan.”

The moment the words left his mouth, Manjoume’s sneer dropped as he realized it was too late to take them back. Judai gasped- a delicate, heavy gasp- and his face twisted again, a torrent of rage and despair contorting his features until they finally just settled into a blank expression. His teeth were grit tightly and eyes fell downwards.

“I’m sorry.” Manjoume said as quickly as he could. “I didn’t mean-”

“No, you’re right.” Judai mumbled, voice flat.

“N-no... “ Manjoume offered weakly, but Judai only turned his head away. “Look, Judai-”

“I’m being selfish again, aren’t I?” Judai’s voice was practically a whisper. Manjoume took a deep breath, trying to push back the thick lump in his throat.

“Of course. You’re selfish. So am I.” Manjoume folded his legs up to his body to hold, curling up and resting his chin on his knees. “If we weren’t selfish people, we wouldn’t be having this fight.”

Judai’s eyes narrowed with the slightest hint of bemusement, despite his still stony expression. He looked back up at Manjoume with the slightest pensive smirk. “I always thought you and everyone else would resent me when I ended up back here. I did such terrible things, and I wasn’t a great friend in the end. You still remember it. And I’m not much better now. So, why do you like me? How could you like me at all?”

Manjoume squeezed his legs tighter. “You idiot. I’ve known you for ten years now. Maybe you’ve been gone most of that but you haven’t exactly changed much. I know what a good person you are- I’ve seen it, even though you have some big flaws. You’ve made mistakes, but you’re a great person with the best intentions. You always were.”

Judai’s stern face wavered as he opened his mouth to say something, but nothing came. Manjoume watched him, the slightest ache in his heart at the sight. The corner of his lips quirked into a tiny smile and he continued.

“And being with you now, that’s just… It’s the happiest I’ve been in a very long time. I don’t know how you do it, but you always get me to stop thinking about all the bad, stressful parts of my life. You even manage to get me to stop thinking about you leaving!” Manjoume’s voice shook at that, and he swallowed. “You made my life a little more exciting, and a lot happier, and if you leave- if that happens, what will I do? How can I go back to the way things were when we don’t even have a chance to see this through to the end? I really like you, Judai, and I don’t want you to go...!”

Only then did Manjoume realize the stinging in his eyes as a burning hot tear began to trickle down his face. He gasped at himself, lip shaking pathetically as another tear fell, then another. Through his blurring vision, he could see Judai’s stoic expression fall entirely; he now looked horrified at the sight Manjoume crying. The embarrassment that caused only made Manjoume’s shoulders shake harder as he lost the ability to control himself.

“J-Jun.” Judai leaned in, hands hovering uncertainly over Manjoume. “W-why are you crying?”

Manjoume could only blubber helplessly in response.

“P-please don’t- I can’t-”

Manjoume buried his face in his knees and curled up tightly. Judai, at a loss, just wrapped his arms around Manjoume as tightly as he could. Slowly, Manjoume relented and let his knees slide away, wrapping his arms tightly around Judai and burying his face into his chest. Judai rested his chin atop Manjoume’s head as the bawling gradually became lighter, stroking Manjoume’s hair gently as he waited. Once the sobs gave way to ragged breaths, Judai leaned back and slid Manjoume’s glasses away from his damp face. “Jun…”

“How dare you,” Manjoume choked out. “How dare you make me like you much, just so you can leave me!”

Judai brought his hands to Manjoume’s face, gently wiping away Manjoume’s tears with his thumb far too slowly for the warm streams rolling down Manjoume’s cheeks. “We weren’t… You weren’t supposed to.”

“But I do.” Manjoume brought his own hands to his face, furiously wiping at the tears that Judai was missing. “Fuck…”

Judai laced his fingers into Manjoume’s, holding them still as leaned in and pressed pressed a chaste, tender kiss onto Manjoume’s lips. A soft whine escaped Manjoume as he finally kept still for the few moments before Judai pulled away, staring intently at him with a solemn, searching gaze.

“I’m sorry.” He eventually muttered.

“Yeah?” Manjoume sniffled, giving a small snort. His voice was raspy and uncharacteristically weak. “Saying sorry won’t fix this.”

“Then let me,” He moved in again, this time getting up entirely and crawling over Manjoume. “Let me try.”

“What-” Manjoume was cut off as Judai caught him in another kiss- slower, deeper, somehow gentler. Apologetic. Manjoume leaned back, his shoulders bumping against his headboard as he wrapped his arms around Judai’s shoulders as comfortably as he could with Judai practically crawling into his lap.

He loved this.

Another sob bubbled up in his throat and Manjoume flinched away from Judai with a whimper, a new cascade of tears pouring down his cheeks. He squeezed his eyes shut, wishing Judai couldn’t him like this- so weak and defenseless. However, his thoughts were cut off by an unusual but undeniable sensation on his face.

His eyes flew open to find Judai unabashedly licking his cheek.

“What the hell, Judai!?” He yelped roughly. “You’re so weird!”

Judai licked his lips; his expression was still melancholy but his eyes were locked on Manjoume’s and he smiled at that anyway. Surprisingly he didn’t quip back but just caught Manjoume in another slow kiss, only breaking away to lap up the tears on the other cheek. Manjoume’s eyes squeezed shut, biting his lip as Judai’s tongue grazed his skin. This was really strange, even for Judai, but Manjoume couldn’t help the heat that burned his face and was slowly spreading through his body. He gasped as Judai shifted down and sucked on his neck, pressing a tender kiss above the mark he made, but then all at once Judai’s weight shifted as he curled around Manjoume, burying his face in the crook of Manjoume’s neck. Manjoume pulled him closer, sniffling quietly and he tried to steady his breath; his chest felt hot and his heart was pounding wildly, and Judai remained silent for what felt like hours.

After what might as well have been an eternity, Manjoume’s body finally stopped trembling from his crying and Judai finally mumbled something, head still pressed against Manjoume’s shoulder. “...I want you.”

Manjoume couldn’t bring himself to snipe at Judai anymore. “I want you too…”

Judai’s mouth twitched against Manjoume’s skin- that little smirk of his probably- and slid off of him. Quietly, he undid his shirt and threw it aside before tugging at Manjoume’s top.

“May I…”

Manjoume nodded, lifting his arms. Judai lifted the shirt off, so delicately that Manjoume would have believed that his old cotton shirt was made from the most valuable silk in the world, and placed it gently on the bedside table before tugging lightly at Manjoume’s pants. Manjoume shifted his hips to allow Judai to slip them off. Before he knew it, Manjoume sat on the bed completely exposed in every way, watching Judai fumble out of his own pants. His breath hitched as Judai kicked his pants off the bed; he wasn’t wearing underwear, something that Manjoume was ashamed to say he had already noticed. Judai locked eyes with him once more.

“Lay down.”

Hesitantly, Manjoume slid into a comfortable position. “Why…”

Judai crawled over him, eye scanning up and down. “I want to look at you. I want to remember every detail about you.”

Manjoume exhaled shakily as Judai quietly surveyed him with kind, adoring eyes. He leaned down and pressed a kiss onto the center of Manjoume’s chest, then dragged his lips down to his stomach and placed another. Manjoume held his breath as Judai’s nose scraped down his hip, and Judai brushed his hands over Manjoume’s thigh and he nuzzled them softly. He peeked up with a concerned look.

“These marks…”

_Shit._ Manjoume covered his face embarrassedly. He usually forgot about the all but faded lines scattered unflatteringly across his upper thighs; they were so easy to hide that Manjoume barely thought about them anymore. “They’re nothing.”

“Jun…”

“They’re from before I met you, okay?” Manjoume relented, turning away sheepishly. “It was a long time ago so don’t get all worried now-”

His words dissolved into a whimper as Judai kissed the inside of his thigh, again and again on each and every scar. “I wish I had met you sooner.”

“I-irrelevant.” Manjoume grumbled, allowing Judai to snake his arm around his leg and lift it. “Nothing would change-”

Judai sucked teasingly on a scar on the very inside of his thigh and Manjoume squirmed, biting his lip as Judai’s voice grumble against his skin. “I hate seeing you sad.”

“Oh, bullshit! But, h-honestly,” He confessed, voice airy and light. “Meeting you helped me…”

That got him a satisfied hum from Judai. Before Manjoume could add anything else, he felt Judai’s tongue finally lick a trail to his crotch and he fell silent.

“You’re so beautiful.” Judai purred. He looked up with a gentle expression. “May I…?”

Manjoume swallowed and nodded.

“Just tell me if you want me to stop, or whatever.”

Another nod.

Judai smiled and pressed another kiss onto Manjoume’s hip bone before moving down again. Manjoume shut his eyes; he had wanted this for a while now, that was no lie. His body felt heavy, sluggish from the crying and the still lingering sadness, but Judai, as always, knew how to distract him from the qualms of reality. He was intoxicating, and despite everything Manjoume knew was still inevitably going to happen, he couldn’t fight off falling into the happy, dizzy haze of that moment. Everything about Judai felt so good.

“I love you.” Manjoume sighed, words slipping out thoughtlessly as he threw his head back. “I fucking love you....”

He could feel the softest movement of Judai’s neck against his thigh as he swallowed thickly, then the warmth of a slow, hesitant exhale.

“I love you too, Jun.”

  
  


**(DAY TWENTY FIVE)**

It was rare for Manjoume to be awake before Judai, and for it to be this morning was especially surprising..

Manjoume rolled lazily out of Judai’s arms and reached over the sleeping body for his glasses, ignoring Judai’s soft snores; his body felt like jelly and they were both still naked, so Manjoume simply layed on his side and finally got a good look of Judai’s body in the morning sun. He had seen most of it before, but in the dimly lit bedroom of the night before or from across the kitchen, Manjoume never noticed the vast array of scars scattered over Judai’s body- nothing deliberate, mostly small dark dashes or some odd shadow where the skin sank as if it healed wrong. Manjoume brought his hand up and traced a finger down the side of Judai’s torso; Judai barely stirred at the touch, only rubbing this hand across face and snuggling his pillow closer.

With a yawn and soft groan, Manjoume leaned in closer, staring at the tiny tattoo the center knuckle of Judai’s right hand. He often forgot it was there since Judai almost always wore his stupid fingerless gloves, and truthfully he didn’t mind it being hidden- it was a rather creepy eye that outlined the bone of the knuckle. Manjoume was pretty sure that the design came from one of Judai’s monsters or something, an odd choice but there was probably a good reason. Despite its strangeness, the tattoo was still endearing in its way; apparently it was a shitty stick and poke that Judai gave himself, and Manjoume couldn’t help but find that image a little hilarious. Manjoume smirked, craning his neck to nip at the tattoo. Judai flinched and stirred.

“Mm,” He cracked an eye open, shooting Manjoume a disgruntled look before his face softened with affection. “Y’re awake, Jun.”

“Yep.” Manjoume brought his own hand up to cover a yawn. Judai smiled and leaned in for a kiss, only getting Manjoume’s palm. “I’m really tired and I don’t wanna smell your morning breath.”

Judai snorted, giving him a smug look. “But I thought you loved me.”

And that’s when Manjoume really remembered: the crying, the fighting, the disappointment, and most importantly- he told Judai he loved him. Judai hadn’t even said it first; Manjoume just kind of blurted it out without thinking.

His face lit up a bright, burning red and his stomach twisted, but Judai just blinked at him tiredly. “Jun?”

Manjoume just covered his face, fingers scraping over the paint that was still left on his face despite the tears that washed over it. His skin was hot to the touch of of his cold fingers, only slivers between them allowing him to peek out at Judai with wide eyes.

Judai pouted nonchalantly. “You forgot already, didn’t you?”

“W-why are you taking this so lightly?” Manjoume sputtered, dragging his hands down his still-pink face. “I bared my soul to you last night and you’re acting like that’s no big deal!”

Judai frowned for a moment before snorting, scooting closer to nuzzle the side of Manjoume’s face. “Of course it’s a big deal. It means the world to me!”

He sat up a little, propping himself up on one elbow to lean over Manjoume. “I love you too. I love you, Jun.”

Manjoume swallowed, a shiver running down his spine. He only barely remembered Judai’s response to his declaration the previous night- too busy with other things- so hearing him say it again made his heart swell with happiness and the much more familiar ache of dread.

“Not enough to change you mind, though.” Manjoume sighed, dropping his hands again. Judai pulled away with an equally weary sigh, lowering his head tiredly.

“It’s not like that. And you won’t change yours. So,” Judai glanced up, eyes meeting Manjoume’s. “Here we are.”

“Yup.” Manjoume looked back at him until Judai’s unblinking eyes and silence made him waver. “What?”

“Hm?”

“You’re looking at me weird.” Manjoume frowned. “If you’re expecting me to start again, too bad. I’m done begging.”

Judai blinked; he seemed caught off guard. “N-no, I wasn’t. I guess we don’t have any fight left in us, huh?”

“Tch. I always do. But you’re a brick wall.” Manjoume rolled over, slotting himself against Judai’s body. Judai wrapped his arms around him as if out of reflex, and they laid still and quiet for a several moments. Manjoume finally tilted his head toward Judai and mumbled, “It won’t be the end when you leave, right?”

“Of course not.” Judai replied quickly, giving Manjoume a convincing-enough reassuring squeeze.

Manjoume’s eyes were still heavy, so he just nuzzled closer to Judai and shut them. “I guess I’ll have to settle for that.”

They stayed there, just like that, for a long while- long enough that Manjoume had spaced out and when next he came to, Judai had pulled away and was slipping on a fresh pair of boxers across the room. Manjoume’s sluggish body felt cold, and he rolled over to desperately seek the traces of Judai’s body heat left on the bed.


	10. one love, two mouths (one love, one house)

**(DAY TWENTY EIGHT)**

Manjoume woke up with Judai’s head resting on his shoulder, but Judai shifted away as soon as he stirred. He rolled onto his side on the other end of the bed, leaving Manjoume free to get up quietly and slink off to the bathroom.

That’s how things were ever since they fought and decided they couldn’t stay with each other, for now anyway.

Manjoume brushed his teeth with a blank expression, glancing back through the door in the mirror at Judai’s lazy figure; he watched as Judai rolled around idly and occasionally their eyes met across the room in the mirror. Judai stared at him with a longing expression until Manjoume had to look away to rinse his brush. The room was silent aside from the running sink.

Judai was becoming distant- he still would surprise Manjoume with a kiss in the hallway and curl around him in their sleep but his fawning and pestering and showering Manjoume with affection had come to an abrupt end, replaced with uncertainty and and caution and a level of restraint Manjoume never knew Judai had. It reminded Manjoume of when Judai first started staying with him; it was disheartening, of course, knowing Judai was drifting away slowly and surely, but it felt like a weight off his shoulders.

The honeymoon phase was over. Things felt real again.

Manjoume splashed a handful of water onto his face, grimacing at the cold sting. He wiped his face and put his glasses back on, noticing Judai was gone from bed and heading out to the stairs.

Despite his troubled health, Judai didn’t exactly look sickly when Manjoume first brought him home; but now Judai definitely seemed to be back at one hundred percent. He certainly didn’t need to stay much longer. Manjoume had known that for a while, though he ignored it, and judging by how Judai’s mess in the guest room was becoming tidier by the day, so did Judai.

Their time was ticking away.

\---

They were together again at breakfast, where they pecked away at Judai’s cooking in silence for the most part.

“When does your vacation end?” Judai finally asked, only glancing up slightly.

“Today, I guess.” Manjoume’s voice trailed off as he actually remembered that, yes infact, his precious time off was coming to an end. “T-they want me to resume practice tomorrow.”

“I see.” Judai sounded sincerely disappointed, not even trying to hide the melancholy look that crossed his face. After a moment he inhaled and mustered up a weak smile. “I guess I should leave tomorrow, then.”

Even though Manjoume knew it was coming, it still caught him off guard; one of chopsticks slipped out of his fingers as he felt his stomach drop. “Y-you’re really gonna go, huh?”

“I mean, sooner or later I would.” Judai’s feigned smile dropped quickly.

“True.” Manjoume stole another look at Judai, who didn’t look back; he just picked at his food with a somber expression. Manjoume’s heart sank at the sight.

The inevitability of Judai’s departure was depressing enough, but what made it so much worse was seeing Judai- his chipper beam of annoyingly saccharine sunshine- seeming so miserable. _Judai’s not supposed to be sad._

Judai’s eyes flickered up to Manjoume’s, scanning over his face quickly as Manjoume realized he’d been staring and hadn’t even picked up the chopstick he dropped. Judai’s mouth quirked into a smirk, heavy with melancholy and adoration. “Jun. Don’t be sad.”

Manjoume’s heart fluttered and he fought back the lump that tried to jump to his throat. “You’re one to talk. You can hardly look at me.”

“I’m… fine.” Judai’s voice was so thick with uncertainty, Manjoume couldn’t keep himself from rolling his eyes.

“Judai, you don’t have to act all cool about this. It’s sad. I’m sad.” Manjoume leaned forward, propping his chin onto his hand. “You’re so sad that’s it’s kinda scaring me.”

“Jun…” Judai sighed. “Sorry.”

“Stop apologizing.”

“Sor- o-okay.”

Manjoume poked at his food, no longer hungry. “Do you want to talk about it…?”

“About what?”

“Why you’re acting all weird.”

Judai gave a strained laugh. “What’s weird?”

Manjoume sighed, gathering his dishes. “You know what? Never mind.”

“Jun…”

He got off and left before he could look at Judai’s despondent face again.

\---

The day passed slowly and quietly, as now it seemed both Judai and Manjoume were tiptoeing around seeing each other. Judai stayed holed up in the guestroom all afternoon, until around sunset when he finally emerged to quickly shuffle to the bathroom for a shower. Manjoume had been anxiously moving from room to room all day- an hour cleaning the kitchen, reading a book for a while in the living room, a nap upstairs. He was watching a duel on television- a couple of nobody low rankers in his league- when he noticed Judai leave his room. He looked over quickly, but by the time he was about to call his name, Judai was already locked in the bathroom.

Manjoume sighed, crestfallen. He could totally cry, if he weren’t still embarrassed about how hard he’d cried to Judai just a few days earlier.

He turned off the TV and quietly went to the guestroom. The soft creak of the door opening was drowned out by the sound the running water in the bathroom, so Manjoume quickly slipped in and shut the door behind him.

The room looked almost the way it did before Judai arrived. Clean and empty. Gone were Judai’s belongings strewn across the floor and furniture. The only thing left was a change of clothes hung over the back of a chair and a packed duffle bag sitting atop the impeccably made bed.

Manjoume looked around, the realization that by tomorrow Judai would be gone finally truly sinking in. He walked over to the chair, lifting the shirt that Judai had laid out. It was his usual black top; Manjoume had washed it a few days ago, but Judai’s scent was thick on it. Manjoume collapsed onto the chair, holding the shirt to his face.

He remained there, quiet, with his face buried in the shirt for what felt like ages. He didn’t really care, because if that was the best of Judai he could get then he’d totally settle for that.

“Jun…?”

Manjoume reluctantly peeked up from the shirt to find Judai at the door, fresh out of the shower. Under different circumstances, he would have taken the time to admire Judai’s wet body but he only looked at the heavy expression on Judai’s features.

“Jun, what are you doing?” Judai said meekly, pushing his hair back from his forehead as he made his way over to the chair. “Are you okay?”

Manjoume nodded, closing his eyes and nuzzling the shirt again. Judai reached down and ran a hand through Manjoume’s hair, causing him to finally lower the shirt and look up at Judai. Manjoume sighed. “I’m going to miss you.”

“Same. But I’m still here now…?”

“Not for long. And you’re avoiding me.”

Judai wilted, looking guilty. “I’m sorry. It’s hard.”

Manjoume nodded again.

“Jun, get up.”

Finally tossing the shirt aside, Manjoume stood up. Judai wrapped his arms around him, pulling Manjoume into a tight embrace. The smell of the soap Manjoume carelessly assigned to the guest bathroom- something earthy and subdued- wafted off his skin but Manjoume still smiled, nuzzling Judai’s neck before burying his face in it. Judai pressed a gentle kiss to Manjoume’s ear, and they stood there in silence for several moments.

“I miss you already.” Manjoume finally broke the silence.

“I’m right here.” Judai whispered.

“Stay here. Stay with me tonight.”

Judai nodded, shifting his stance as Manjoume pulled away from his neck.

“And let’s be completely honest with each other, for once.” Manjoume muttered. “No bullshit. Just, just us.”

“Jun…” Judai seemed reluctant, guarded, still, but his shoulders dropped slightly as his body became less tense. “What do you mean, exactly?”

Manjoume shrugged, reaching up to cup Judai’s face gently; his skin was hot and rough with the beginning of stubble under Manjoume’s delicate fingers. “I love you, Yuki Judai.”

He hadn’t said it since the fight, and his words came out small and tender and feeble. Judai visibly softened, tilting his head to the side to nuzzle Manjoume’s hand. “I love you too.”

“Don’t pull away from me just because we’re going to be apart for a while.” Manjoume continued, sliding his hand down to Judai’s neck, where his fingers teased at the ends of Judai’s damp hair. “I don’t want my last memory of you to be sad.”

“I think that’s inevitable.” Judai’s voice was shaky, though Manjoume couldn’t tell if that was just from him being cold, still only wearing a towel. “I just- I just don’t want it to hurt when I leave.”

“Please, I’ll deal with it-”

“No, for me.” Judai reached up to pull Manjoume’s hand back to his cheek and he turned to place a soft kiss onto his palm. “Leaving somewhere has always been hard. But this- here, with everyone… with you.”

Manjoume paused, watching Judai lace his fingers with his. “But you move around so much. Are you always this sentimental when you leave a place?”

“Only when there’s someone special.” Judai mused, his gaze drifting downwards at nothing in particular. “I almost don’t want to go.”

“I mean, you know you don’t have to leave.” Manjoume mumbled, wrapping his arms around Judai’s neck. “We discussed that.”

Judai pouted, rocking a little. “I still want to go though. I don’t belong here, not yet anyway.”

“Y’know, I wish you’d stop waxing poetic. I don’t understand what you’re saying half the time.”

“I dunno. I dunno either. I just need to finish clearing my head.”

“That’s why you travel?”

“Sort of. I guess.”

“Seven years wasn’t enough?”

Judai shrugged, his expression lightening a little. “There’s a lot to clear out. I’m all complicated.”

“Tch. God, do I know.” Manjoume pulled Judai closer. “Do that then, figuring whatever out. And tell me all about it when you get back.”

“Yeah.” Judai leaned in, resting his forehead against Manjoume’s. “Yeah, I will.”

“Because you’re coming back.” Manjoume glanced up at him.

“Yes. Of course.”

“So it’s going to be okay. In the end.”

Judai looked gently at Manjoume, eyes dragging thoughtfully over him for a silent few moments. “...Okay. Yeah.”

“Okay, so stop moping.” Manjoume gave him a small, reassuring smirk, tugging Judai closer. Judai raised a brow, the pensive expression dropping slightly from his face as Manjoume brushed their lips together. “It’s sad and boring and I want to enjoy my last night with you before you leave.”

Judai nodded, smiling slightly as Manjoume caught him in several short kisses.

“Whadya wanna do then?” He breathed between kisses, wrapping his arms around Manjoume’s waist. Manjoume rolled his eyes, though a smile was plastered onto his face as he seemed very pleased with Judai’s change in mood.

“Don’t be so coy.” Manjoume bounced on his heels until Judai got the message and lifted him up; Manjoume wrapped his legs around Judai’s waist and finally pulled him into a longing, desperate kiss. Judai practically moaned into the kiss; he clumsily backed up to sit on the bed, landing Manjoume right in his lap.

“Jeez, Jun!” Judai gasped once Manjoume finally pulled away; he finally seemed more relaxed and his eyes lit up as Manjoume gave him a bright smile, licking his lips triumphantly.

“God, why did I wait around all day for you?” Manjoume sighed, kissing Judai fiercely again. Judai whined happily, nipping at Manjoume as their mouths parted. “Hey!”

“Y-you’re being awfully aggressive!” Judai sputtered, face growing red. Manjoume scoffed and pushed Judai playfully, pinning him down on the bed. “Oh my god, Jun-”

“Just because you keep catching me with my guard down doesn’t mean I’m a passive player in all this.” Manjoume growled. “You know me, Judai!”

Judai just swallowed, nodding dumbly as Manjoume straddled him.

“So you’re leaving for a while. Fine.” Manjoume purred, running his hands over Judai’s bare chest. “But I’m going to make sure you don’t stop thinking about me for one second. You’ll never forget me, and I’ll have you crawling back to me in no time.”

“Jun!” Judai squeaked and covered his completely red face with both hands, and Manjoume felt a great sense of pride as how much he’d gotten Judai to squirm. He chuckled, leaning over to pull away Judai’s hands, then leaning down entirely for another kiss- this one slower, sweeter, kinder. He could practically feel the heat radiating off of Judai’s face, but Judai’s hands relaxed and fell limp in Manjoume’s and he kissed back welcomingly.

“Judai,” Manjoume sighed, voice becoming soft. “I love you.”

“Loveyoutoo…” Judai mumbled dizzily.

“My turn now.” Manjoume grinned, leaning back to toss aside his shirt. Judai laughed, reaching down to loosen the towel from his waist until Manjoume swatted away his hand. “Leave it to me, slacker.”

“Y-yessir…!”

“And Judai?”

“Jun?”

“For once, I don’t you want to be quiet.”

Judai covered his face again, laughing even harder. Manjoume smiled- a wide and unrestrained smile- at Judai, his boyfriend, completely undone beneath him with the brightest, silliest grin on his face. He was so in love with Judai, and his goofy smile and his beautiful eyes and the way the atmosphere and perhaps the whole world changed when he laughed. He was going to miss him so much.

So he was going to enjoy the hell out of right now.  
 

**(DAY TWENTY NINE)**

"Jun, you're tired. Go to sleep."

"I don't want to yet."

"You can hardly keep your eyes open!"

"Then say something interesting to keep me awake!"

"Did I tell you about that time I was in China..."

"You told me that one before."

"Ah, okay, okay."

"It sounds exhausting, always traveling."

"Is that what's making you so tired?"

"Tch. Don't you ever get tired?"

"Heh. Only when my body does."

"You need to rest more. You'll get sick again."

"Yeah, yeah. I'll be fine. I'll just come home if I get sick again, and you'll take care of me."

...

"Jun?"

"I like when you call my place 'home'."

"I mean, kind of. Sort of."

"Hm?"

"It's not this room, or this house really. It's you."

"What?"

"You feel like home."

...

"Jun...?"

"I like that."

\---

Manjoume grumbled as he drifted out of the cloud of sleep; his eyes were heavy and he could barely bother to open them.

He and Judai stayed up the very early hours of the morning, sometime when the sun had yet to rise but the room was bright enough that he could memorize the colors of Judai’s eyes once they finally settled into silent, comfortable resignation. They fucked for a while, then just cuddled and talked, punctuated by Manjoume stopping Judai to kiss him a few dozen times. While getting Judai to talk about his feelings was nearly impossible, he was a pretty decent story teller. So they talked for hours, until eventually Manjoume just drifted off in the middle of some story about his trip to Argentina.

With a tired groan, Manjoume finally pried his eyes open, realizing what made him wake up so soon in the first place. Judai wasn’t in bed.

Usually Manjoume would panic at that realization- and admittedly he still did, just a little bit- but this time he mostly just sighed and dragged his fatigued, aching body out of bed to throw on some clothes and head downstairs.

The guestroom and kitchen were empty, devoid of Judai’s things and Judai himself. Manjoume’s stomach tightened but he just pulled on a sweater and hobbled outside as quickly as he could muster. He was relieved to find Judai’s bike still parked on the curb, with Judai fastening his bag to the back of it. Manjoume cleared his throat.

Judai jumped, turning quickly to face him. “Morning Jun!”

“Trying to sneak off, are you?” Manjoume’s voice was still rough with sleep, sounding more irritated than his calm face showed. Judai shot him a sheepish, apologetic look.

“Y-yeah.” He walked over to Manjoume. “Sorry.”

“Couldn’t even wake me up to say goodbye.” Manjoume huffed, earning him a whimper from Judai.

“Sorry! It’s a self defense thing, y’know?” He whined.

“Yeah, yeah. I know.” Manjoume rubbed his eyes, yawning softly. Judai reached up to brush back Manjoume’s uncombed hair. “I figured.”

“Thanks.” Judai said gently. “For putting up with me. And for last night, especially.”

“My pleasure. Thank for being, uh, good company.”  
  
Judai laughed. “My pleasure.”

They stood there awkwardly for a moment, with Judai looking down and kicking at some stray leaf on the ground or another and Manjoume watching him, trying not to yawn anymore. He blinked tiredly, examining Judai’s unsure expression.

“Judai.” He spoke up. “Do you really want to finish what we started?”

Judai glanced up with a surprised expression. “Yes! Of course I do.”

Manjoume swallowed, a small smile pulling at his lips despite his exhaustion and the dull ache of sadness swelling back up in his chest. “Cool. Don’t come back.”

“Wha,” Judai blinked a few times, words completely caught in his throat for once. “Jun! What!?”

“You heard me. Don’t you dare come back!” Manjoume put his hands on his hips, looking at Judai challengingly. “Not until you’re back for good.”

“J-Jun!” Judai stammered. “Don’t scare me like that!”

“I mean it.” Manjoume sighed. “Promise me you’ll take our relationship seriously.”

Judai exhaled, a relieved smile growing on his face. “Y-yes, of course.”

“And I’m not waiting forever on you, okay? I refuse.”

“Okay, Jun-”

“I mean it!”

“Jun.”

“What-”

Judai cupped Manjoume’s face with both hands, instantly silencing him, and smiled that radiant, beautiful, hopeful smile. Manjoume stared, too distracted by how fantastic Judai looked in the morning sun to keep talking. Judai leaned in, leaving barely any space between their faces.

“Okay, okay.” He pressed his lips to Manjoume’s in a gentle kiss, quickly pulling back to look Manjoume in the eyes. “I’ll be back before you know it. Don’t worry.”

Manjoume could only nod weakly. He was embarrassed to admit that he kind of truly believed Judai. “...Do that again.”

Judai laughed and pulled him in for another, longer kiss. Manjoume was weak to resist, wrapping his arms around Judai’s neck possessively. Judai had to practically pull Manjoume off of him to break the kiss, holding him at arm’s length as they caught their breath; despite his smile, Judai cheery demeanor began to fade as he took one last, long look at Manjoume.

“I need to go.” He breathed out. Manjoume looked disappointed and Judai desperately bowed his head. “C’mon, prolonged goodbyes are so sad!”

“Fine, fine!” Manjoume finally relented, allowing Judai to escape back to his bike.

He finished up packing his bag and his cat onto the bike and he reached for his helmet, bringing up to his head slowly. Manjoume watched quietly, arms crossed as he waited. His eyes met Judai’s, and Judai quickly closed his as he gave another cute smirk.

“See you soon, Jun!”

“Yeah.” Manjoume swallowed. “I love you.”

Judai’s smile faltered for a moment. “I love you too.”

He quickly crammed his head into the helmet as Manjoume, half startled, called to him over the warming up of the bike’s engine. “Don’t do anything stupid!”

He couldn’t hear Judai’s reply; his voice remained too soft and became drowned out by the engine’s roar. Manjoume squinted, trying to read Judai’s lips; he caught him mouthing “Jun” before his mouth twisted into a forced smile and he held up a peace sign for Manjoume. It was a nice attempt to hide the tear rolling out of the helmet and down his cheek- something so small and insignificant but it might as well have been a dagger in Manjoume’s heart.

Manjoume didn’t say anything- pointless, he figured. He folded his arms tighter, trying to keep tears from springing to his own eyes.

Judai keep a tight smile on his face as he quickly wiped at the track of the tear on his jaw.

He pulled away from the curb.

And then he was driving down the street.

Turning the corner.

Gone.


	11. take me home tonight

**(DAY THIRTY ONE)**

Johan was the last person Manjoume would have gone crying to. He had good friends- Asuka was blunt and understanding and Sho, though wishy-washy, was always willing to listen to him. He still felt awkward around Johan, especially after the whole blacklight party incident.

Manjoume had barely even been home in the couple of days since Judai left. To be fair, he was busy making up for lost time in the pro league and seeing his friends as they slowly were beginning to disperse. He dodged the inevitable concerned murmurs of, “Judai went back on the road? Are you okay?” with a steely resolve that came pretty easily after years of having professional persona. He would only falter when he finally got home just in time to sleep.

He didn’t want to dwell on the darkness of the hallway or the empty spot on his bed where Judai used belong. He fell asleep quickly simply out of exhaustion from keeping himself so busy.

He woke up in the morning and for a moment he was surprised to be alone, before remembering and making a note in his head of how many days Judai had been gone.

Two now.

In maybe five more days, waking up alone would be a habit.

The hard part was not knowing how many more days until Judai returned.

He never gave much thought to the fact that Judai didn’t have a phone or anything when he was around, since it never mattered before; but now Manjoume cursed himself for not buying him one. He’d then quickly shift his thoughts to something else because thinking about how badly he wanted to buy Judai gifts and talk to him only made his heart sink.

Basically, despite his well rehearsed exterior, Manjoume was a fucking mess inside.

So when Johan showed up to watch one of his practice matches, Manjoume hardly felt his usual snide resentment. He almost was a little excited to see him, though he’d never admit it- Johan always reminded him of Judai. Just enough.

Manjoume finished up a practice match, half heartedly depleting his opponents lifepoints and shuffling off to fetch a drink when he spotted Johan in the stands, waving with a friendly smile. Manjoume tilted his head, before quickly climbing up to the stands to join him.

“What are you doing here?” He greeted, prompting a snort from Johan.

“I just can’t get a ‘hello’ from you.” Johan smirked, patting the seat beside him. “I’m checking on you.”

“I’m fine.” Manjoume responded automatically, taking the seat but not looking at Johan and instead staring distantly across the stadium. He hated being checked on.

“Alrighty then.” Johan leaned over, resting his arms on his knees. Manjoume finally glanced at him, raising a brow.

“That all?”

“I mean, you’re not the type of person who wants people to pry at you, right? You seem fine.” Johan shrugged. “Understandably bummed, but fine.”

“You don’t know that.” Manjoume huffed. Johan’s smirk softened sympathetically.

“Your dueling is different. I didn’t need to talk to you to know you’re having a hard time.”

Manjoume blinked, leaning forward. “My dueling? Is it bad?”

“No, just different. Apathetic, I guess. Are you okay, really?”

“Of course.” Manjoume sighed. “The apathy is just because I’m kind of dead inside, but I’m fine.”

“I’m here if you need anything.” Johan offered quickly. “But, I mean, he’s coming back.”

“I know. That’s a comfort.” Manjoume nodded, staring at the floor. “But I don’t know when. And I can’t contact him.”

“You’ll definitely hear from him! Just, y’know, when he decides…” Johan sighed too leaning back and staring toward the ceiling. “But he always come through in the end, so.”

“What was I thinking?” Manjoume groaned, holding his heads in his hands. “I can’t live like this!”

“Naw. You can do anything.” Johan chuckled, still looking skyward. “You’re Manjoume Thunder.”

“Shut up. That’s all fake acting shit. This is real.” Manjoume’s hands dropped as he gave a heavy sigh. “He left me powerless to do anything. He’s the worst.”

“You have me.” Johan sing-songed. Manjoume turned to give him an irritated look, but Johan just reached into his shirt pocket and pulled out a small slip of paper. “And I’m a powerful member of you team, Thunder!”

“What is this?” Manjoume grumbled, eyes widening as Johan grinned at him and placed the paper in Manjoume’s idle hand.

“It’s not that convenient, but I think you’d like to have some way to connect with Judai. That’s the e-mail he uses. He doesn’t always check it, since he doesn’t always have access to a computer, but it’s something, right?”

“Johan.” Manjoume read the address slowly, biting his lip. “Thank you.”

“So you’re not powerless.” Johan nodded, watching Manjoume softly. “Don’t expect him to reply to everything, especially quickly, but I know he reads everything. If you ever miss him, you can just e-mail him.’

“Thank you.” Manjoume’s face heated up as he felt the prickle of tears begin to tickle his eyes and willed himself not to break, not now. But a sudden wave of grief just washed over him-  _ he wanted Judai back _ \- while at the same a spark of hope burned in his chest.

He had a way to Judai after all.

“No problem.” Johan chuckled at Manjoume’s red face, looking sincere. “I know I messed with you at the party, and I’m sorry for that. So this is the least I can do for a good friend.”

“Thanks.” Manjoume wiped at his eye and Johan enthusiastically produced a tissue from his other pocket and held it out for him. “S-seriously?”

“Judai said you were a sap!” Johan laughed. “I bet you don’t want your colleagues to see.”

Manjoume just groaned, taking the tissue with a huff.

“I need to go, so I’ll let you get back to things.” Johan stood up and began to walk towards the end of the row. “But call me if you need anything, okay?”

“Y-yeah, thanks.” Manjoume watched him, not yet moving himself. “See you.”

“Bye!” Johan hurried up the steps of the stand, leaving Manjoume alone with the tissue and the address. He sniffled quietly and blew his nose, rereading the address on the scrap of paper about a hundred more times as a calm washed over his body and the sadness resided again. By the time he had pulled out his phone to enter the address into it, he had pretty much memorized it.

He stared at his screen until his manager called for him to come back to the stage. Manjoume slipped the phone back into his pocket and got up, smiling slightly.

He would e-mail Judai eventually. It had only been two days.  
  
  


**(DAY THIRTY FIVE)**

_ Judai- _

_ Still remember me? _

_ xJun _

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


**(DAY ONE HUNDRED EIGHTY SEVEN)**

Judai always replied to him, even if it took him more than a few days longer than Manjoume wished it did; never anything long or poetic but enough to give Manjoume something to work with. Judai sent a couple postcards from small foreign cities Manjoume was only vaguely familiar with, with short messages saying he missed him or saw something that reminded him of Manjoume. Once Judai even sent him photograph of himself posing with what looked like a small deer in a forest. Manjoume may have made that his phone home screen background.

All of the short emails and infrequent postcards weren’t the same as having him around though.

Life went on in Judai’s absence of course. Manjoume was as popular- and by extension busy- as ever, valiantly fighting Sho away from his title as the champion, a title he nearly lost early in his post-Judai-leaving moping. He got used be living alone again, and to getting his Judai fix entirely through written message every week or so. Things weren’t ideal, but they were passable.

They were fine.

Manjoume would never admit he counted the days Judai was gone, but he was fine.

Until he got the RSVP to Hayato’s wedding.

Seeing Maeda Hayato was almost as much of a rarity as seeing Judai, since he was living in America and just as busy as Manjoume with being one of Industrial Illusion’s senior artists, but Manjoume guessed he was still acquainted enough with him to receive an invite.

His immediate thought was something along the lines of,  _ “Well, now I have to figure out what gift to get the happy couple.” _

His second thought was, “ _ Wow, I fucking wish I could take Judai with me.” _

And just like that, Manjoume’s mood was soured for the rest of the day.

Unfortunately he had a major pro-league event that day- The Open Challenge Event. It was something the league hosted once a year where amateurs could challenge the pros; it was half a scouting event and half just for the fun of watching younger duelists trying to hold their own against the top ranks. But for Manjoume it was just an extra taxing workday. 12 hours. Full make-up and costume. Televised. The whole nine yards.

At least he could blow off some steam.

It was nearing four in the afternoon when Manjoume was waiting beside the stage yet again with a scowl plastered on his face. Sho, having wrapped up his duel, walked over to stand beside him.

“Ready to go again?” Sho laughed wearily.

“Ready to go home.” Manjoume grumbled back, crossing his arms as the assistants for the event got the stage ready for the next challenge.

Sho snorted. “You seem annoyed. I mean, more than usual.”

“Hayato’s wedding invite.” Manjoume spat, earning him a quizzical look from Sho.

“Yeah, it sounds nice.” He blinked. “Oooh, you’re upset about your plus one, huh?”

Manjoume just grumbled, half heartedly kicking at the ground like a child.

“I mean, the wedding isn't for another couple months, so you have time to rope him into it.”

Manjoume rubbed his temples, careful not to smudge his face paint. “I guess.”

An assistant scurried toward them to tell Manjoume they were ready for him to take the stage. Sho looked around idly, noticing the man stepping onto the other side of the stage, as Manjoume took a deep breath and steeled himself for yet another lame duel.

“You’ll figure it out, Manjoume!” Sho raised his voice as the audience began to cheer for Manjoume. “Just ask him.”

“Yeah, yeah. Busy right now,  _ Kaiser. _ ” Manjoume growled, stomping onto stage and flashing a cool smirk to the camera closest to him. The audience roared and began to chant for him (“One! Ten! One hundred! Manjoume! Thunder!”) which only made his smile grow wider. He’d worry about Judai later, as usual. Right now, he was ready to do the one other thing that made him truly happy.

He threw his fist into the air and was met with thunderous cheers. He gave an icy laugh and finally turned to see who was standing on the opposite side of the stage. “So who’s going to be my next victim- “

Manjoume froze when he saw his opponent.

He was wearing an billowing, over dramatic black hooded cape that didn’t suit him at all, and the hood fell away to reveal hair that was longer and unkempt- not the tangled, auburn mess that used reach his back but it was at least as long as it used to be in school. Thick stubble framed a growing smile as Judai stepped onto the arena stage.

Manjoume felt like the breath had been knocked right out of him for a moment, seeing Judai there-  _ right fucking ther _ e- with that stupid grin on his stupid beautiful face. Manjoume wheezed and took a deep breath, trying his best to compose himself for the audience he was trying his hardest to remember was totally watching. Manjoume looked around frantically to catch an image of himself on one of the large screens, realizing the the goofy smile plastered on his face that he quickly clenched his teeth to hide.

“Hi there.” Judai chuckled, only making Manjoume more aware of how idiotic he must have looked right now.

“You came back.” Manjoume’s tried to keep his voice steady, but it still trembled slightly with enchantment and about ten thousand other emotions that were flooding his brain at the moment.

“I said I would.”

“This is… sooner than expected.”

“You think?”

“Well yeah,” Manjoume was struggling to keep up his threatening, professional front. “Last time you left, you were gone seven years.”   


The audience around them was murmuring and many spectators gasped at the length of Judai’s last absence, but they were slowly fading out of Manjoume’s attention.

Judai shrugged, shooting him another radiant smile. “I couldn’t stay away. I missed you a ton.”

“R-really?” Manjoume’s smile was getting harder to control.

“Of course, silly. After all, we’re,” Judai paused finally acknowledging the large audience around them. “You know.”

“Yeah.” Manjoume took a deep breath. “Y-you’re really here.”

Judai laughed again. “Do you need me to pinch you?”

Manjoume shook his head, cheeks growing pink. His heart was pounding so hard that he was sure his chest was going to actually burst open; without thinking he brought his hand up to his chest to feel his heavy heartbeat in his chest.

He hadn’t felt anything like this in so long.

Judai tilted his head as he watched him, a glimmer of concern in his eyes. “You okay, Jun? Hanging in there?”

“Shut up.” Manjoume said meekly, dropping his hand. He felt a bit dizzy and the hushed murmurs of the audience was ringing in his ears, but his eyes and attention were fixed solely on Judai. He looked good- the stadium always had really fantastic lighting so maybe that’s why the light was catching his hair perfectly and putting a perfect shine in his hazel eyes. Manjoume silently cursed the audience that he had to fight to remember was present. If only they weren’t there, he’d have Judai against the fucking wall by now.

But instead they were just staring each other down quietly, surrounded by hundreds of confused spectators waiting to see what happened next.

Manjoume took a deep breath, trying once more to make his wavering voice strong and intimidating again. “You know, in order to be here you have to be a challenger.”

“Yeah, that’s what this whole thing is, isn’t it?” Judai nodded nonchalantly.

“So if you’re just here to cause a scene, you ought to leave.” Manjoume sneered, finally slipping back into his pro persona. He half-hoped Judai would comply, since dealing with in front of so many unnecessary witnesses was pure torture. But the other half of him kind of didn’t care.

“No, I want duel too! Of course I do!” Judai dropped his backpack to the ground and scrambled for his duel disk. Manjoume shook his head at the sight.

“This is it, isn’t it?” Manjoume laughed himself, trying to keep his smirk from erupting back into an idiotic smile. Judai looked up innocently, but Manjoume knew better. “Your grand gesture.”

“If you want to see it that way.” Judai pulled his deck out of the holder on his belt and shuffled it.

“You’re such a melodramatic loser.” Manjoume readied his own deck. “But I guess this is the only way to celebrate your return.”

“Yeah, about that.” Judai stuck out his tongue with a nervous smile. “How mad will you be if still take a few trips?.”

Cards spilled to the floor as they slipped out of Manjoume shaking hands, prompting a low gasp from the audience, and Manjoume’s cool, professional demeanor finally dissipated.

“What?” He squawked, not bothering to retrieve his fallen cards because  _ what were his ears even hearing _ . “A few- Judai! We had an agreement!”

“That? Really, Jun?” Judai scratched his chin, pouting slightly. “Just a few…”

“Excuse me? Are you kidding me right now! I was being serious!”

“But my heart yearns to travel!”

Manjoume scoffed loudly in disbelief, before yelling so loud that the microphone he forgot he was wearing gave a pathetic feedback whine. “Your  _ heart _ ?”

\---

Johan chuckled, watching the couple bicker from the audience. “Judai, you dummy.”

Sho, beside him, looked a little less amused by the whole situation. “He’s joking, right?”

“It’s Judai.”

“True.” Sho tapped his fingers on the ledge of the balcony. “Did you convince Judai to do this?”

“Nah.” Johan leaned forward, propping his elbow in the ledge. “I mean, not really. He really wanted to come back and see Manjoume, and I was like, yeah you should then, and he decided this was how he wanted to do it. Make a show out of it.”

He smiled fondly, though Sho just gave an exasperated sigh. “This is supposed to be a serious event though!”

\---

“I can’t believe this!” Manjoume fumed, stepping past the assistants who had run on stage to pick up the dropped cards. “You promised you’d stay! I saw you crying when you left, idiot!”

“Come on!” Judai grinned sheepishly. “We can take turns or something! You come with me, then I stay with you, et cetera...”

“I am not having this fucking conversation again!” Manjoume shouted, earning him another gasp from the audience and frantic yelp from his manager who began scrambling around, rattling off about tape delays. “You told me you’d take our relationship seriously!”

“I do! Jun, I’m seriously in love with you!” Judai was practically glowing, and the audience collectively aww’d at the declaration. Manjoume’s face burned and he wanted to cry, possibly tears of joy or embarrassment or fury- he wasn’t sure. “Think of all the places we can see if you come with me! The people we can help! We can save the world together!”

Judai’s tone was annoyingly chipper and  _ adorable _ and Manjoume took a deep breath, quickly closing the space him and Judai.

“Don’t be so arrogant.” He broke into a sarcastic smile. “There are tons of other people who can save the world.”

“Jeesh, you’re so stubborn.” Judai tutted, glancing down as Manjoume stood in front of him.

“You’re one to talk!” Manjoume growled, stamping his foot as he tossed his head back to glare up at Judai. Their faces were inches apart, a familiar and oh-so-missed position, and Judai’s nonchalant smirk broke into that dopey, breathtaking smile that Manjoume missed seeing every morning. His own grumpy expression faded as he took it in, and he was so wrapped up in  _ how fucking much he missed Juda _ i that he barely noticed as Judai leaned in and pressed his lips to Manjoume’s. 

\---

Hundreds of miles away, on Duel Academia island, Asuka snorted as the argument unfolded. “They’re too much!”

Beside her, Rei crossed her arms and raised an eyebrow quizically. “I dunno, this seems kind of serious.”

It was Rei’s first day of training to be a teaching assistant, but of course they had to take a break to watch Manjoume at the open duel event; the surprise appearance of Judai only made the whole thing so much more entertaining. Never once had Asuka seen Manjoume break his professional persona, and certainly not this severely. She couldn’t help but laugh as the censors barely caught Manjoume’s f-bomb.

Manjoume and Judai continued to squabble as the camera zoomed in right in time to get the perfect shot of Judai locking lips with Manjoume. Rei practically screamed.

“They don’t even care that they have an audience.” Asuka said, half incredulous and half tickled. “Amazing.”

Rei gaped at the screen, a mix of amusement and envy plastered on her face. “Judai’s a dead man!”

Asuka laughed. “Manjoume would never! I bet he’s so happy right now.”

“I really hate them.” Rei shook her head, glaring at the shameless kiss gracing the TV screen.

\---

The audience gasped and hollered at the kiss, snapping Manjoume back to his senses. He practically screamed as he broke the kiss and stumbled backwards. “Judai!”

Judai, on the other hand, looked pleased with himself. “Yes, Jun?”

“D-don’t call me that at a time like this! It’s T-Thunder!” Manjoume sputtered, hoping his face wasn’t as beet red as it felt. Judai stepped close again, this time putting his hand over Manjoume’s microphone, sending a low rustle over the speakers of the arena.

“Being out there, travelling- you know I love that. But I miss you. I miss home.” He spoke quickly and softly and Manjoume really wished they weren’t in front of thousands of people right then. “I can’t tell you what I want, but I know I want to always come home to you.”

“Judai!” Manjoume swallowed, whispering just loud enough to hear over the crowd surrounding them. “Why can’t you just give me straight answer? Why are you doing all this?”

“What do you expect from me?”

“Don’t make lame excuses for yourself! I- I’m at work Judai! And I’m really serious!”

“Oh, come on! Don’t treat me like a dirty secret! I just thought it’d be fun.” Judai smiled brightly. "What if I become a pro like you?"

Manjoume heart skipped a beat. “Thought it’d be- Judai! You couldn’t have chosen a worse time for this shit!”

“I guess, but- it’s as good a time as any.” Judai looked aside sheepishly, finally reflecting on the situation.

“J-Judai… N-no! I need answers. You can’t just show up making a scene like this and already have one foot out the door-”

“It’s not that!” Judai fingers fidgeted around the microphone and his grin softened. “I thought a lot, about stuff, and I just- I keep leaving behind the people I love. You were right- we’re only getting older and I d- I can’t leave you behind. I want to stop doing that.”

Manjoume wanted to scream. “Good, then stop!”

“Hey! I’m figuring this out, one second at a time. I know that’s really irresponsible but I don’t know how else to do it!” Judai gave him a reassuring smile. “Help me?”

“What? How?”

“I don’t know, I don’t know what I’m doing!”

“Yeah, you’ve made that very clear!”

Judai snorted, beaming again. “How about the best way we know how?”

Manjoume blinked, frowning.

“Hm?”

“...I hate you.” Manjoume whined.

“You love me.” Judai laughed, causing Manjoume to turn a deeper red than it already was, and pulled his hand away from the microphone. He winked at Manjoume, clearing his throat. “Well. Thunder. I figured I couldn’t convince you. So, don’t worry. I’ll stay.”

Manjoume groaned at the change of subject or perhaps Judai’s cheesy acting, keeping his voice steady despite his ecstatic heart. “Judai...”

Judai nodded, before the cattish grin returned to his face once again. “On one condition.”

Manjoume’s frown returned tenfold, but he simply nodded, waiting to hear Judai’s offer.

\---

Thousands of miles away, somewhere In South America, Jim pulled the laptop closer while quietly cursing the shoddy wi-fi hot spot they’d set up. The stream lagged for a moment before Judai and Manjoume’s fight finally reappeared on their screen.

“Manjoume seems really happy-don.” Kenzan mused, leaning over Karen against Jim.

“It’s kind of hard to tell.” Jim gave him a bemused look. “He seems furious to me.”

Kenzan nodded. “Well he probably is. But also happy-saurus.”

“I guess you know him better.”

“I mean wouldn’t you be happy if you couldn’t see the person you loved for a long time, and then they came back for you?”

“It wasn’t that long… but I suppose you’re right.” Jim’s smile grew as he glanced between Kenzan and the computer screen, now showing a close up of Manjoume’s face as he waited for Judai to speak. The stream froze on that- Manjoume’s face, frowning with furrowed brows but glowing with excitement, desperation, patience. “Frozen again.”

He looked back at Kenzan, who was blushing stupidly at him. Kenzan quickly looked away, pouting at the screen. “Why’s internet so damn hard to get workin’....”

“We’re in the middle of a forest, Ty.” Jim laughed, watching the image on the screen flicker as the connection rebooted. “Judai really has Manjoume wrapped around his finger. Or is it the other way around?”

Kenzan shrugged. “Who knows with those two.”

\---

“I’ll stay, if you beat me in a duel.”

Manjoume blinked, exhaling softly. “Seriously, Judai?”

“We’re dueling anyway. This is my challenge!” Judai grinned cheekily.

“This is completely unfair!” Manjoume groaned. “I shouldn’t have to _ win _ you!”

“Don’t you wanna?” Judai teased. He moved past Manjoume and retrieved the deck from the poor assistant trapped on stage with them. In a swift motion, he placed it back into Manjoume’s hands, holding it there as their hands met around it. “Dueling is your second love, and I know you want to beat me.”

“Right now, it’s my first.” Manjoume closed his fingers slowly around the deck before finally pulling it away. “You’re unreliable and you overcomplicate things.”

He slipped his deck into his duel disk and began to walk back his side of the field. “But if I need to beat these stupid ideas out of you, then fine.”

Judai took a few steps back and readied his own duel disk. “How badly do you want me to stay, Jun?”

Manjoume turned to face him, having slipped back into his professional-mode. He simply scoffed and shot Judai and icy glare. Judai seemed unaffected by that, just smiling cutely as the disgruntled announcer tried to start officiating the match. The audience was roaring and Judai’s smile grew as the cheers became louder.

“Let’s find out then.” He purred, narrowing his eyes.

Manjoume nodded as he raised his own duel disk. Despite his best efforts, a smile began to spread across his face as well.  _ I’ll show him. _

_**“Duel!”** _  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> welp that's a wrap on this!! to be honest i have some one-shots i wanna write of these two still but for the main story that's my hasty finish
> 
> until next time (　´∀｀)


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